what do men want?
sex
what do men want?
slaves
what do men want?
servants
what do men want?
only to do what they want
what do men want?
money
what do men want?
power
what do men want?
ownership
what do men want?
control
what do men want?
reflections of themselves
Are your powers of premonition pretty lousy? Me too. I have no idea who is going to win elections or what the stock market is going to do next quarter.
But when it comes to infidelity, you would've thought that everyone is clairvoyant and that particular super power skipped you. Because after you discover your spouse was cheating on you, there will be folks out there shaking their heads saying, "surely you must have known."
One of the worst things about being cheated on is others' wrongheaded notion that somehow you were in on the deal. That you knowingly turned a blind eye. Perhaps you and your cheating spouse had an "arrangement," wink, wink, nudge, nudge. The unspoken assumption is that you kind of deserve infidelity for being such an oblivious idiot.
Of course, this is just a way for the smug to distance themselves from the pain and humiliation of betrayal. Just like some folks think cancer and other sorts of misfortune are contagious, it's easier to think we have control over Bad Things That Happen. It must be because you failed (unlike me). Blaming the victim is a nice little voodoo smug people do to protect themselves from the scary uncertainty that they too could be played.
Perhaps you were smug once too, safe in the knowledge that infidelity would never happen to you.
I know I was. I thought cheating is what happened when you had a sexless marriage, or let yourself go, or married some obvious Lothario. (The Lothario of my imagination being some cross between Austin Powers and a skeevy sales and marketing rep.) My husband loved me! My husband pursued me! My husband and I had sex! I was safe. Insomuch as I thought of infidelity at all, I thought it happened to other people. People with either really, sad pathetic marriages (see sexless and ugly above) or glamorous Bohemian people who were swept up in torrid affairs, helpless against the inevitability of their fated love. Solid, dull Midwesterners don't do drama, I thought. I was immune.
We all see the world through our own moral lens. And if you have a particularly good set of morals (and assume everyone else does too), that makes you a good mark. If you've never experienced infidelity before and you know that you wouldn't cheat on your spouse, you stumble around the planet with a certain naivety. You wouldn't have done such a thing and therefore you can't imagine a world in which the person you are most intimate with daily would do such a thing either.
That's why infidelity is so shattering. It completely up-ends your view of the world, your sense of reality, of whom you can trust. When it happened to me, it was like that scene in the Twilight Zone where the "normal" people suddenly rip off their masks and reveal that they are pig-snouted aliens. I was shocked to my core. The world has PIG-SNOUTED ALIENS?! WTF?! No one TOLD ME!
Trusting your spouse is not pathological. It's what normal, loving people do. And that is why betrayal and manipulation are so very ugly. Because abusers take that trust -- that social glue that binds us together -- and they turn it on you. Use your loving "benefit of the doubt" against you.
And as if that crap isn't painful enough, it's that much more painful to have the peanut gallery out there gawking and pointing and saying you were somehow party to your own abuse.
You can only be in denial about something you know. Betrayed spouses beat themselves up for being chumps. The deception is humiliating. In retrospect the deceit looks so obvious (he never answered his cell phone, she was a sudden aficionado of Brazilian waxes...) And of course, you probably had gut feelings that things were off. But your cheater told you, no, everything was fine. Or no, actually you were the problem. And you believed that. Until you couldn't any more.
After you know you've been cheated on, it's pretty normal to go through the stages of grief. Denial is one of those stages, as is bargaining. (Pig-snouted spouse... okay... maybe it's not that bad. Maybe I can work with this...) Once you know, however, that knowledge is a gift. It doesn't feel that way, of course. It feels like death. Like someone bulldozed your heart, and shoveled its remains into one of those radioactive waste containers, never to be touched again like Chernobyl. But really, knowledge is power. The worse part is not knowing.
Surely you knew? No. You didn't. But now you do. The rest of your life is up to you. If you ask me? I think you should run as fast as you can from the pig-snouted aliens. Godspeed.
Don't cry. I WILL cry.
Don't sneeze.
Don't cough.
Don't sleep.
Don't go to the bathroom when you feel the urge, hold it.
Don't think.
Don't question.
Don't trust your own feelings, your gut instincts.
Don't isolate yourself, spend time alone doing "nothing".
Don't disobey authority.
Don't disagree.
Don't go off on your own.
Don't follow your own path.
Don't have your own opinions.
Don't dress differently.
Don't look different.
Don't be natural.
Don't dream.
Don't be a leader.
Don't be the lone ranger.
Don't go against the crowd.
Don't show or talk about your real, true feelings.
Don't accept yourself the way you are.
Don't accept anyone for who or what they are.
Don't be happy with what you have.
I WILL, I DO, I AM ALL OF THESE THINGS I AM NOT SUPPOSED TO BE, TO FEEL,
TO THINK, TO DO, OR TO WANT .
Society sets the stage with props and puppets of illusions and beats the crap out of people who are being themselves. If you're natural then you are an outcast, shunned,
disgraced, not included and not invited. You are labelled as a freak, eccentric, weird,
a goofball or an oddball.
"Be yourself" is in my blood. My grandmother told me to be myself all through
my childhood. My mother, my father, my children and my uncles,
aunts and cousins were and
are themselves.
They know they can't be anybody else.
Sunday, May 24, 2015
I am not without vice or addiction. Everyone is addicted to something. I haven't found on person yet who is not an addict.
The day and time will come when men refuse to go to war and slaughter the innocent and die so that the materially rich and powerful can live their luxurious, parasitic lifestyles.
When the man realizes he is one member of one race, the human race, he will refuse war and desire peacel
"The man who moved a mountain was the one who began carrying away small stones."
Chinese Proverb
Saturday, May 23, 2015
Divided we fall.
Divided we fail.
Divided we fight.
Friday, May 22, 2015
Mother: pillar of strength.
Creditless, meaningless, worthless.
Watch a hero or be a hero?
Movies, television, music, sports.
Spectators are the majority, doers are the minority.
"Throw your dream into space like a kite, and you do not know what it will bring back, a new life, a new friend, a new love, a new country." -- Anais Nin
It doesn't matter how smart you think you are or how intelligent other people think you are, you can't work 3 full time jobs. One full time job at 40 hours a week is enough and
often too much for one person when you consider all of the other duties and obligations
life requires.
Time is spent. Used up without your permission, without you being able to control when it will pass. It can't be bought, can't be returned, replaced, doubled or
tripled. It can't be sped up or slowed down according to your wishes.
Time can't come back. You can't do it all over again. History can't be changed.
Now is all there is. You can only do what you are able to do at this moment.
No going back, no jumping forward.
24 hours in one day equals 168 hours in one week.
8736 hours in one year. For most we are awake 2/3 of that time
which is about 5824 hours a year.
Most of our waking time is spent in repetitive actions.
We develop a pattern and say the same things, go to the same places,
see the same people, perform the same mundane activities,
rarely thinking, saying or doing something different.
Thursday, May 21, 2015
A woman is a woman. Female.
A man is a man. Male.
A woman is a man. Female is male.
A man is a woman. Male is female.
"Isn't that every man's dream?" said by my husband May 19, 2015
Irobot, I am a machine.
Drones, androids, dolls, robots. Bodies without their own brains.
For several years I have been saying that it won't be long and a guy can go
to Walmart (or other stores) and buy the android version of what he wants.
A woman can buy the android doll she desires.
What a wonderful solution to a lot of problems.
Overpopulation. Population control. No unwanted pregnancies-- androids can't
reproduce.
Fighting, wars, murders, theft, burglary, vandalism, jealousy eliminated if you have an android partner.
They do what they are programmed to do. Submissive, No self will. No pride.
No creativity. They won't run away. They won't disagree. They never want to do their own thing
or "find themselves".
Police, jails, politicians, government, military would be drastically reduced.
Having children, procreating would be only for the chosen few and the
few who have chosen to have children.
I want to do what I want to do not what you want me to do.
I am not a machine or a robot. I am a living human being with feelings
and desires separate and different from yours.
Online cartoon catalog offers comics for licensing
Welcome
Cartoons and comic humor and single panel gag cartoons are ideal for attracting attention to your professional print or other projects. Look through the various catalogs of cartoons by accessing the Cartoon Catalogs mentioned above . For example, BUSINESS CARTOONS takes you to my business cartoon selection . . and so on. High resolution image files can be sent to you and the gaglines under any cartoon can be changed to fit your readership or the project you’re working on. Coloring can be added to any existing cartoons also. If you have any specific question relating to a certain cartoon, please contact me and you may find answers in my ToonBlog. Customized humorous illustrations are also a specialty and any kind of image can be created under your art instruction. Rough sketches can be attached and then changes and modifications can be made according to your specific instructions. Final artwork can be sent to you in any high resolution file format. Cartoons in any of the selections here can also be redrawn a specific way or something could be added into the overall look and appearance of the image. A lot of options are available. My cartoon catalog page provides you access to categorized selections offering easy gallery previews of any image!
It's significant that this year the planets Venus and Mars come together three times in the sky, signifying a re-balancing of these two archetypal energies. Our collective destiny (the North Node of the Moon) will be finishing it's sweep through Venus-ruled Libra this year, modeling a more just, diplomatic and balanced way of handling relationships, while the old war-like habits of the South Node in Mars-ruled Aries need to be let go of. Our cosmic instructions are clear. Love rules the day. Compassion and Wisdom have to be brought to the table.
Venus also rules (directs its energies) this New Moon in Taurus and she is all for making love, and not engaging in war unless love is at stake. The planet Venus is named for the Roman version of the Greek Aphrodite, the primordial Goddess who arose from Mother Ocean's union with the severed phallus of the sky god, Uranus. This myth tells us a deep spiritual truth about life here on Earth: In the Beginning,our collective unconscious (Mother Ocean) took in heaven's generative codes (Uranus' phallus) and gave birth to our collective evolutionary purpose, which is to embody the archetypal energy of Aphrodite: Love, Beauty and Wisdom and the awakening of Psyche/Soul within each of us.
Sadly, patriarchy's need to repress this spiritual goddess energy has created inequality between the sexes as well as an imbalanced reliance on left-brain rational thinking. This vital, feminine archetypal energy has been twisted into unconscious, violent sex, pornography and a constrictive ideal of beauty. And even more important, our ignorance of the importance of right brain, feminine consciousness has brought about a loss of Wisdom.
Re-balancing the masculine doing energy of Mars with the feminine being energy of Venus entails centering ourselves in our true beingbefore deciding how we want to do things differently. Mars is at the service of Venus; our actions arise from our essence; our head is at the service of our heart. These energies are part of our makeup--we can redeem Venus' archetypal powers by engaging in sacred sexuality, by creating beauty in our lives and by tapping into the Wisdom of the Anima Mundi/ World Soul. A re-valued Venus can free the Imagination, help you know yourself and your values, and acknowledge your role as caretaker of Mother Earth.
Magnolia Trees and Daffodils at Kew Gardens (image by Laura Nolte) DMCA
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The archetypal energy of Taurus is The Garden--a place of beauty and wonder and peace. In the Garden, we can let go of the world's worries and surrender to our senses. In the Garden, we just have to BE. Venus rules the senses and her ancient temples were Gardens. As that wise man Jesus once said Look at the lilies of the fields. They neither toil nor spin and yet they are arrayed in more splendor than even Solomon in all his glory. The magic of beautiful flowers is that they can make us forget our cares and center us in the moment.
What would happen if we set up our tents in the Garden for a while? Long enough for us to remember our sense of wonder and delight at Earth's bounty and beauty. Long enough for us to step outside our cultural conditioning and discover other visions of Being. Sadly, that moment of beauty will make us more aware that our culture destroys that beauty and peace for the sake of expediency, selfishness and greed.
The sign of Taurus asks us to be Stewards of this Garden Paradise which is our Home. We are failing at this.
This Taurus New Moon offers us a chance to change the way we relate to Mother Earth, and our own bodies, personally and collectively. Humans are part (an unruly part) of Earth's biosphere and we can choose to be her spokespersons. With Mercury's retrograde a day after this Taurus New Moon, spend time thinking outside the box and open up to new ideas and visions of living and loving. As we shake off the patriarchal paradigm of life, we have to find a new vision to take its place--a more holistic, just, compassionate, sustainable vision of life here on Earth.
Mercury is retrograde from May 18 to June 11. So prepare yourself to re-think your life, re-do what needs doing and re-orient yourself to a new world. The Sabian symbol for Mercury going retrograde at 14* Gemini is: Bridging physical space and social distinctions, two men communicate telepathically. This symbol asks us to consider transcending the limiting beliefs of our culture and connect (a Venus trait) to each other in new and seemingly mysterious ways. We are here to evolve!
This Taurus New Moon occurs on Sunday, May 17th at 9:13pm PDT and on Monday, May 18th at 12:13am EDT/ 4:13am GMT. A Taurus New Moon is an especially fertile time to plant a seed of a new thought, a vision, a plan or a goal. Plant a literal seed to symbolize your plans and then nurture them to help them grow strong.
The Sabian symbol for the Sun and Moon at 27* Taurus is: An old Native woman selling artifacts of her tribe on the streets. Our culture needs to return to basic community values and rebuild our communities and the world in more peaceful ways. The old Wisdom to accomplish this is still available if we look for it in everyday life. The Alchemists said that Lady Wisdom stood in the streets, offering herself and her wisdom to people, but they ignored her. We can no longer afford to be so blind.
Taurus asks us to consider our resources and our talents and decide how best to use them. If we still stand in patriarchy's corner, our goal is probably to make money. If we step away and ask what our purpose is, we'll discover alternative ways to use our resources that will benefit us as well as the Earth.
Virtues are not praised nor appreciated in this human world.
The more virtuous you are the more you are stomped into the ground
and eaten up by the worldly who practice and promote the 7 deadly sins.
PROMOTED
Pride
Avarice (greed)
Wrath (anger)
Lust
Envy
Gluttony
Sloth
"To give pleasure to a single heart by a single act is better than a thousand heads bowing in prayer." -- Mahatma Gandhi
Sunshine does not come in a bottle.
Lots of distractions equals little and few accomplishments.
hope is not a course of action
you must take action and follow your instincts
am i really a failure?
am i doing what i am able to do?
OR am i unable to fit into other people's boxes,
unable to keep up with demands placed upon me
that i did not create, do not endorse nor believe in?
have i failed to be myself?
does not being someone else make me a failure
or have i succeeded at being me and failed at being
all of the things deemed normal by the majority?
Hard lessons
SEX
Just because they want to fuck you doesn't mean they love you
or care about you or anything or anyone you care about
Being intimate, having sex, screwing, banging, any word you can think of
to describe the act of procreating does not equal love
It does not mean compassion, caring, understanding, concern or appreciation
The act itself means nothing but what it is: two or more bodies temporarily merging
and stimulating the sex organs of at least one being
POLITICS
social groups and ways of socializing that have learned to say
what you want to hear, look and act how you want them to appear
yet do the opposite of what they say and promise.
hypocrisy on its highest level with group leaders living like kings
and followers living like peasants or savages
RELIGION set of beliefs designed to control masses, to mystify and confuse with
fantastic stories of supernatural beings and include unrealistic expectations of idealistic perfection unattainable by live beings
LOVE
exists between some mothers and children
rarely exists between unrelated individuals
CONTROL
the only thing you have a small fraction of control over is yourself
and even that is questionable
FREEDOM
is a dream quest we desire and imagine is possible but is an illusion
EQUALITY
a human hope that is merely a delusion
FAIRNESS
a human hope that some strive for but is yet another delusion
GOOD AND BAD
terms humans invented for things, ideas and experiences that please or
displease them, benefit or destroy their existence yet are nothing more
than words to explain their emotional interpretations of things
Sunday, May 17, 2015
Love a hater and they still hate. Love won't make a hater a lover.
Saturday, May 16, 2015
I only imagine I work independently. It is a fantasy that my thoughts and dreams are
original. We are all parts of a cumulative whole, fragments of the one source.
[ih-fish-uh nt]
Spell Syllables
Synonyms Examples Word Origin
adjective
1.
performing or functioning in the best possible manner with the least waste of time and effort; having and using requisite knowledge, skill, and industry; competent; capable:
a reliable, efficient assistant.
2.
satisfactory and economical to use:
Our new air conditioner is more efficient than our old one.
3.
producing an effect, as a cause; causative.
4.
utilizing a particular commodity or product with the least waste of resources or effort (usually used in combination):
a fuel-efficient engine.
If you would be successful, first you must walk hand-in-hand and side-by-side with successful people.- Nido Qubein
Friday, May 15, 2015
Don't worry about it. Frequently said by men to me and others.
Thursday, May 14, 2015
No sorrow, no sympathy, no compassion. Apathy boldly exists.
My burdens are my own, no one shares them, nobody wants to hear about it.
People, especially a certain person
conveniently take no blame for spiritual destruction.
I can hear the words spoken by the narcissist after my departure
just like I have heard them over and over during my existence.
"It's not my fault. I paid for this and I paid for that. I provided you with
a vehicle. You lived here rent free. I worked 20 years at a job and you
haven't worked much at all. You haven't paid for much of anything. I paid
most of the bills. I work hard and you hardly do anything.
You do the laundry and that's about it. You're worthless."
What is, what was my purpose?
What good am I to anyone?
Am I a burden to anyone? Can I completely take care of myself?
Can I work 50 or more hours each week for the rest of my life
and pay all of the expected bills and all of the unexpected expenses?
Jun. 4, 1990 Royal Oak Oakland
County Michigan, USA
PORTLAND, Ore., June 10— Janet Elaine Adkins, who took her own
life last week using a newly developed suicide device, was remembered by friends
today at a memorial service that also followed her careful planning. The
brief and simple service at the First Unitarian Church here reflected the upbeat
and unsentimental way in which Mrs. Adkins had lived and chosen to die.
Mrs. Adkins, a 54-year-old musician and teacher who was suffering from
Alzheimer's disease, became an immediate national symbol after taking her life
last Monday in a Michigan campground in the back of a 22-year-old Volkswagen van
with a device developed in Michigan by Dr. Jack Kevorkian.
On Friday a
judge in Pontiac, Mich., ordered the doctor to stop using the device while
prosecutors decided whether to charge him in connection with Mrs. Adkins' death.
The device consists of an intravenous tube through which a person can administer
lethal fluid by pressing a button.
Speaking today of the worldwide
interest in Mrs. Adkins's decision, the Rev. Alan G. Deale said: ''I do not
think Janet intended to become a crusader or a pioneer in the battle for death
with dignity. That is, in effect, what has happened.''
Mr. Deale said he
had supported Mrs. Adkins's right to decide when she would end her life, and
added that once the choice had been made, ''she entered history in a way that I
doubt even she, wise woman that she was, would have predicted.'' He added,
''Janet Adkins became a pioneer in the discussion of the matter of death with
dignity.''
Mrs. Adkins also was remembered today as a person who took
control of her death precisely because she loved life.
''She was a very
upbeat person,'' said her husband, Ronald, before the service. Mrs. Adkins, the
mother of three and grandmother of three, taught piano at home and English at
the local community college.
The service included readings and music
selected by Mrs. Adkins. Among them were a string quartet by Borodin, a folk
song, ''When I Need You,'' and Beethoven's ''Ode to Joy.''
Mr. Adkins
said his wife's role in planning the service was part of the ''closing process''
through which she insisted on keeping control of the ending of her life, even as
her sickness began to rob her of control.
According to her wishes, Mr.
Adkins said, he arranged for a funeral home to cremate her body, once an autopsy
is completed, and to have her ashes scattered over the ocean. He said these
actions would be taken without family participation.
But despite her
careful planning, Mr. Adkins said, his wife's death had taken an unexpected turn
when it drew worldwide publicity.
''This was something we had not
foreseen, not to this extent,'' he said. ''Janet and I were told by the doctor
that this would probably be a newsworthy item and that there would be some
controversy over it, but I never envisioned anything to this extent.''
Mr. Adkins said his wife had viewed her illness as ''a bad joke'' but
that the amount of publicity might be a sign that it had had a purpose, to bring
questions of death and self-determination into the open.
Alzheimer's
disease, which causes progressive memory loss and often, in its final stages,
total debilitation, is considered to be incurable. It is the nation's
fourth-leading cause of death.
About a year ago, after Mrs. Adkins's
disease was diagnosed as Alzheimer's, her family said, she began making plans to
take her own life before the symptoms became advanced.
Mrs. Adkins had
begun to suffer small gaps in memory, but had remained alert and vigorous enough
to beat her son in tennis a week before her death.
Today's service was
led by Mr. Deale according to instructions Mrs. Adkins gave him at a meeting on
May 31.
Of that meeting, Mr. Deale said: ''When she was sitting here
that day, I said to her, 'You look fine to me.' But she said, 'I can't remember
my music. I can't remember the scores. And I begin to see the beginning of the
deterioration and I don't want to go through with that deterioration.' ''
Mr. Deale said it was his sense, as he met that final time with Mrs.
Adkins, that the decisions of a dying person must be honored. The strength and
calm in Mrs. Adkins' bearing only reinforced that sense, he said.
''As
she and her husband got up to leave, I said, 'If this is the last time I am
going to see you, we should have a hug.' And she said, 'We sure should,' and she
gave me a great big hug and went out the door.''
Credit: New York Times,
published June 11, 1990
Burial: Cremated, Ashes scattered at sea.
Created by: Noor Record added: Dec 04, 2010
Find A Grave Memorial#
62555609
"High self-esteem isn't a luxury. It's a necessity for anyone who has important goals to achieve."
-- Jack Canfield
Thursday, May 7, 2015
"Celebrate the success of others. Bring people up, not down."- Author Unknown
Tuesday, May 5, 2015
Life is not about ending at a destination. It's about the journey along the way until our final destination: death of the body.
What if everyone earned the same wages, the same amount of money, pay per minute, hour, month, year or
whatever time frame chosen?
What if money didn't exist?
What would happen if people actually did things out of the kindness of their heart? What would living be like if they practiced true charity, kindness, admiration and appreciation
of everyone and all things?
What would happen if no one thought they were better than someone else and realized there
are just differences, preferences and individual choices and one is not better nor higher or
lower than the other?
They are not "equal" on the human scale because humans try to decide the value of something
by measuring it, calculating its weight, time, effort, demand and abundance or lack of.
We fight about equality, fairness and worth, things that do not even exist on the source energy
or cellular plane of reality.
Their is no price that can be paid in money or material things for an intangible, abstract thing
like a natural and genuine smile.
You, your partner, or someone important to you have a heightened awareness of subtleties in your environment, whether it's sight, sound, touch, taste, or smell.
You can become stressed out and upset when overwhelmed and may find it necessary to get away, maybe into a darkened room, to seek solitude, relief and comfort.
You are very creative.
You are very conscientious, hard working, and meticulous, but may become uncomfortable and less efficient or productive when being watched or scrutinized.
You feel compelled to file and organize things and thoughts, also enjoy simplicity and may become overwhelmed or even immobilized by chaos, clutter, or stress.
You are very uncomfortable when feeling things are getting out of your control.
You get a sense of comfort and well being when around a lake, river, stream, the ocean, or even a fountain.
You may experience mood swings, sometimes occurring almost instantly and can also be affected by other people's moods, emotions and problems.
You have a deep, rich, inner life, are very spiritual, and may also have vivid \s.
You are very intuitive and you feel that you can usually sense if someone isn't telling the truth or if something else is wrong.
You get concerned and think or worry about many things, and have also been told "you take things too personally."
You have had the experience of "cutting people out" of your life.
You were considered quiet, introverted, timid, or shy as a child.
Here are a few more to consider... Can be startled easily. Cautious in new situations. May have trouble sleeping. Extra sensitive to pain. Don't like crowds (unless they are kindred spirits). Avoids violent movies and TV shows. Has a deep respect and appreciation of nature, music and art.
Do some, or many, of these statements ring true for you, your partner, or someone important in your life? If so, you or they may be a highly sensitive person or "HSP." Whether you already know something about the trait and temperament of highly sensitive people, or if this is your first introduction to the subject, welcome! The goal and intent of this website is to impart information, provide support and be a resource to individuals with the trait of high sensitivity and for the people in their lives.
Watching and thinking are not doing and experiencing.
Why are most people more interested in watching movies about people doing things yet they don't take action, don't understand the concept or the moral of the story.
They worship heroes and heroines but never do anything to become one.
Heroes are here not out there. Worship the life that exists now.
Now is all there is.
