Dirty Mind they have

 this is why I should always be covered up in my body and use caution with any word coming out of my mouth

comments made by MIKE: "what are you wearing? see thru clothes.. what do you want to do have sex with that person? (said about my eldest son who was coming over that day it was boiling hot outside and the thought never crossed my mind about doing that with my own son. I was simply hot and wanted to wear cool loose clothing. ...
" your tits are showing through your shirt, i see the tops of your breasts, i see your ass when you bend over wearing those shorts, that skirt, dress, anything."    even when he sees my legs he cannot stop himself from reaching out and touching my skin to see if my legs feel soft and smoothe. 

when you are wearing that long shirt make sure you wear long shorts to cover your rear end because someone anyone neighbors could see your ass butt. oh he (the neighbors like chris and ken) would love to get his hands on that if he sees your body. 

accuses me of having affair/relationship with any male i have met then he meets them screens them out befriends them keeps good contact with them to make sure i have nothing to do with them. thinks if i talk to someone it means i want to have sex with them. includes all people we know and have known. 

"he is a sucker" comment made when damon was little and still using bottle and breastfeeding, comment from MIKE

"here, take him. he is hungry. what do you want me to give him to suck on, my dick?" made by ED

licked licks his lips when darin was talking about being in the phillipines with young girls all around him when he goes there to visit his very young wife in her 20s

the first words he says about everything are negative and assumes 80 percent of the people will do something bad like stealing when the opportunity arises. he sees dark side of life in all areas. 

focuses on war, money, destruction, crime, corruption, 

gets irritated aggravated over all things. 

if he hears the word sex when we are around anyone he gets very angry. once we were with the neighbor sharon she was driving i was in the front seat he was in back. she started talking about the sounds men make when they are having sex and imitating them and he got a mad mean twisted face then later accused me of bringing up the subject of sex. i said she was the one who started talking about it, not me. he insisted it was me when it was her.

yet they get off on porn at home in private and expect me to keep covered up .. what do they do when they are in public and see the other women wearing super tight, flimsy, see thru clothing. lots of females show off their boobs and butt and some wear lingerie...fishnet stockings with garter belt short tight skirt and crop top like the woman i saw at the zoo on april 30, 2026. i have seen women dressed like this in various places like gas stations and stores like walmart. what do these guys do when they see the girls dressed like this?

Simple. Childish

 tantrums ,  fits. fast food. immediate satisfaction

media addiction, porn videos

stereo equipment, hoarding junk

hates cleaning anything

bad temper

uses fast fixes muscle rubs pills alcohol

thinks my name is beck and call

egotistical

driven my money material things sex appearances

rude 

not careful conscientious about hands fingers touching things

does not wash hands often enough

spreads  germs

wears used clothes unwashed from thrift store

bad armpit body odor

thinks i am a slave

calls me stupid

yells cusses often

puts on fake nice sweet voice when manipulating wants something

gets things they want often expensive items thinks i dont need luxury things or much of anything

socially inept

unattractive to most women even repulsive

eyeballs girls and women as sex objects

thinks everybody owes them

addicted to sweets junk food

has to have sweet drink all day and with meals

encyclopedic mind of work hobbies like music parts cars guns

believes they are good with finances but hates accounting.

disorganized receipts

addicted to news politics sports competition

shits on what i say

unable to care for babies

not very good with children

animals around cats dogs guinea pigs ferrets etc

spends lots of money on what they want

blasts their music and videos doesn't care how it affects others

expects people to like what they like

Eats dessert immediately after a meal. snacks all day

 begins first thing in morning 

sees food grabs eats it

 

Slacker when it comes to basic things. Runs off to get instant self gratification in other things

SLACKER when it comes to:

 taking out the trash

solving problems of daily frustrations quickly

cleaning the bedroom, bathroom, living room, kitchen, garage, any room in the house

doing laundry, dishes

getting rid of animals cats dogs guinea pigs ferrets any kind of

cleaning up after pets

doing things with woman, wife, girlfriend that she likes

IMMEDIATE Self gratification:

Sex

food

get money 

helping their weird friends and neighbors asap

He and others have to have

 constant outside focus on something like audio radio video tv internet physical activity

loud mouth news or sports people 

loud music of various genres

control

listen to crap and watch stuff so they dont have to sit with their thoughts and think

games played like chess 

never meditate, be introspective

never candle gaze or look at beauty of nature like a butterfly 

dislike reading a book

would rather look at fast moving  pictures

these guys must have constant aggravating competitive stimulus and they do not listen to their wives do not like peace calmness relaxation originating from within themselves

they have short fuses blow up quickly lose their temper over little things like other drivers spilt water or any substance

they cuss curse god alot at every opportunity

stare profusely at naked or partially nude women or faces of pretty cute females girls

must have dessert immediately at the end of a meal

eat too fast or eat while working or walking

think sex is just a form of exercise

leave mess after eating

ignore laundry

let trash stack up

keep tabs on me and what others are doing

think big things are what counts most

do not keep me informed ongoing basis instead toss things at me last minute

shoot orders

hate artistic minds like mine

detest poetry cant understand it

make secret phone calls and texts

praise each others prowess work

demoralize women

say i am mad pissed off that just burns my ass i ought to knock you on your ass i should bust you now in the face. you are lazy for relaxing reclining when you eat. you are worthless good for nothing stupid dont deserve anything

say shut the f up get outta my face

Hours daily dealing with food, dish washing, messes made by them. HUGE time waster

 Time wasters:

Food searching, prepping, cooking, washing, throwing away the trash food scraps and garbage. Organic food scraps and meat packages that stink to the high heavens if not done properly.

Dirty dishes, glasses, silverware, pots, pans. Constant mess.

He says "It's NO big deal" every time he grabs another glass, a bowl, plate or a piece of silverware that did not need to be DIRTIED. 

I am the one wasting my time, energy, money, water, electricity, soap, cleanser dealing with this stuff every single day. It destroys my hands and fingernails, my skin looking worse by the minute. My nails split, peel, crack, break and my hands look terrible and old.

These men in my life : MLS, ECM, MCM, JWL do NOT deal with this shit.

They just want to eat FAST food, ready made, leave the mess, take off and go do what they want to do which is work on some project usually outside then sit around watching screens for hours upon hours on tv, computer, cell phone for the rest of the day. They watch stupid videos, news, some music they like, a bit of porn sex movies here and there when they feel the urge.  They play games. One plays chess at any oppotunity. One plays video games. Another one likes things like monopoly and card games like poker, spades, hearts.

They accumulate crap in the house, on the property, in any available space like garages and sheds and often extend their storage areas into other people's properties. They store stuff all over and often use unmarked containers: cardboad boxes are a favorite thing to store crap in, that way other people don't know what is in the box. Some stash their porn away in hidden places, others leave it out in the open.

They do not take out the trash immediately. Instead letting the garbage pile up. they do not clean out the trash bins cans or recycle containers. Several use cover up sprays to try to fix the stinking smell of a rotten garbage can. Or they will buy all kinds of expensive fancy cleaners for specific things instead of doing basic cleaning out of all things with soap, cleanser, baking soda, vinegar, bleach and water.

They complain about the smell of a disinfectant spray, the smell of vinegar. One complains about certain food smells or things like hairspray I use rarely but can inhale gasoline fumes and sprays used for automotive work with no problems whatsoever.

Most will put their hands on everything and anything then touch and spread their germs and grease and dirt all over because they do not wash their hands as they should.

Door jams, cabinets, refrigerator handles, microwave doors and any area they touch are black. They are not conscious of what they touch and do not give one rats butt about it.

A few of them sneeze out in the open blowing their sputum and spit and spray all over the room.

One uses the same old black dirty filthy rag to wipe down anything and everything. He keeps black rags in the shower and the bathroom is absolutely filthy. The floor is covered with containers and other things he does not move and clean and does not clean the floor in the bathroom or the walls, the sinktop or the entire shower or the toilet.

Several scatter their junk and things all over the house, the yard and anywhere else.

Every one of them loves to look at cute, pretty, beautiful girls, young women. 

One man who died 2 years ago never got married, never lived with a woman he had intimate relations with because no woman would put up with him. He was a complete mess, had a bad temper blowing up quickly over material things. He was a hoarder obsessed with collecting things. He prized his things and money more than anything else. He never had children thank goodness so his genes were not passed down neither his legacy. He was adopted and never knew who his real mother and father were. He paniched whenever he saw water anywhere to clean with. Water was seen as damaging because he tied it into electronics; televisions, stereo, amps, headphones, record players, tape decks which can easily be ruined by water. His house was never cleaned since his mother died in 1992. In 2021 he sliced the bottom of his left foot open on something, he claimed he stepped on a deli slicer and got perotinitis blood poisoning. He called me asking me to come over and get his crutches in the basement because he couldn't walk down the stairs. I ended up clearing out his house. He ended up in the er at St Lukes East then was transported to several hospitals, care facilites then finally at a nursing home in Independence, Missouri where he died on May 11, 2023.

Interesting because the man I live with is also panic stricken when he sees a drop of water on the floor, the countertop, behind the sink faucet, water sprayed onto the house especially the vents in the eaves of the house outside (soffit). He is also a money, material thing worshipper. Mammon is his god. 

They also get mad at me for cooking "too much food at once" or feeding a cat or other animals "too much". They all eat little bits of food all day long which I do not do.  They like to buy already made foods, drinks, spices, etcetera. Foods that are put into containers with measured portions. Individual serving sizes. (I hate doing that because it costs more money and is very unhealthy)

He would rather watch others and own stuff

 he would rather watch movies and look at pictures of strange women in magazines instead of being a mature grown up man male partner who is respectful and loving to his woman

personal relationships with wife girlfriend spouse at work business are difficult impossible

he thinks he is the boss master in charge superior to the woman . he believes he is smarter and more important than her. 

he will dole out material things and money to her sometimes and talk down to her like she is a doormat slave and cant figure out why she is not happy.

he refuses to do things with her she likes 

he sits in the chair or on the sofa 

he gets in the way while she vacuums and cleans house

he doesn't want furniture moved around

his life is self gratification and satisfying himself as fast as he can often at the expense of others and disregarding others including and especially me

he spends large amounts of money on himself wont give me the time of day

he does not want to

 do things for others. 

will do things for money. self satisfaction gratification, physical pleasures like eating, sex

clean his room

do laundry, deep clean house

cook or make prepare own food or cook for others

raise children

relate to others

empathize

(will work hard or long hours for material gain, to boost ego, own material things)

seek spirituality understanding

do something for someone else for free

self analyze, reflect

respect, appreciate his mother

enjoy simple things

admit his mistakes. shortcomings

follow rules. laws guidelines 

go to the doctor

Everything about him stinks

He does not understand words. He goes by what he sees and material things he has

 zero listening skills. he cannot understand simple things like "clean" your room or any item cleaned properly. he thinks money and material things rule 

He is all these things

 hoarder, pack rat, scrapper, junkyard dog

resourceful, rude, impulsive, impatient

controlling to the max maximum 

misogynist. thinks women are stupid incompetent

believes women ask to be raped

has not raped me and says often we dont have enough sex

keeps locked file cabinet porn magazines i saw one day this or  last year when he was looking for paperwork

faux strangled me several times. i can recount each incident and cause. 

nov 13 2005 first time pushed me to ground floor i was at my desk sun eve just got home from working at super flea. he barged in my bedroom looked at curtain got pissed sd you always tear things up. he got back from tim nolan next door neighbors funeral or wake before funeral. i still dont know what he was actually mad about that day. i did nothing as usual to cause his physical assault 

no fun period. acts old stern grouchy bitchy nearly all the time. no joy in hardly anything. 

refuses to do or participate in any good feeling activities like festivals concerts fairs dancing movies playing ball or any game except solo chess on his laptop computer.

each time dining out eats same stuff too fast has to have dessert eg ice cream at burger king or dairy queen immediately after the burger fries chicken etc.

each meal at home when i eat he gets pissed about something has to be critical of food or how much i eat monitors my food yet eats any random trash he wants all day long. thoroughly upsetting my digestive system. has to get up see what i am eating every time. paces floor gets behind me grabs food if he thinks it looks good eats not because he is hungry. picks fight during meal. cannot sit still stay put during any meal breakfast lunch dinner. gets up opens fridge for individual things. he cant get several items out at once. puts one type of food on plate then gets up to get additional different foods sauces spreads .

watchful, watching things constantly people neighbors places things news weather.. eyes darting constantly wherever  he is

addict .. junk food sweets sauces cookies fast food, porn, conspiracy news online or in newspapers things promoting paranoia and one sided viewpoints black and white thinking,  

opinionated 

redneck

fear based

reactive

lacks empathy

vengeful

impulsive impatient 

fixed resistant to any changes of anything 

language deficient lacks understanding of word meanings 

sarcastic arrogant haughty mean hateful passionate one track minded at times

cluttered disorganized piles of everything he saves anything he comes across even a used condom

incorrigle unteachable

maintains false beliefs lies and argues with the dictionary definitions and people that are professionals in their field of work hobbies or anything 

will not listen to anything that contradicts what he believes

argumentative provokes instigates fights and problems 

picks at all people criticizing their looks beliefs habits appearance clothing cars trucks what they drive where they go and pastimes they have. when the pastimes hobbies beliefs ideas differ from his he becomes irate and often out of control going off like an atom or hydrogen bomb

does not want to let go of any material thing

hides things, money, activities 

closes up windows house fearing someone will see in especially when lights are on at night and closes blocks windows thinking it lets air in. mls put metal bars in wall over one basement window and boarded up the other window which does not allow escape in case of fire or emergency. totally against the law and building codes anywhere 

adamant about locking house doors and keeping garage door shut

jealous insanely 

hypocritical

righteous indignant full of haughty pride

yells often daily. 

frequently says why do you bring up the past which includes the last few minutes and anything before that.

says i dont want to hear it. talk about it.. go away get out of here/my face before i hit you. 

 denies treating me bad. feigns amnesia refuses responsibility for anything bad negative he says or does. 

physically active. deems his actions as the only important ones.

believes in master slave idea

can't have a real mature relationship or marriage with any women due to the deep level of childish emotional maturity level 

treats me like a mindless empty headed plastic wooden doll who has no brain or feelings because he doesnt care cannot comprehend that i am a live human being 

will leave piles of junk, trash, any item stored at any property or other people's houses storage areas

jwl had 3 large storage units at super flea full of old junk household and stuff used to sell at the music store

keeps shit from anyone he has had contact with as "memoirs" 

follows me around freaking out anytime i move things or clean or cook or eat or do anything

shoots orders at me to do what he thinks ought to be done in any area i am thinking about talking about or am visually doing

socially inept

bossy authoritarian dictatorial

jwl and ecm addicted to sports like football

mls addicted to news that he thinks is real regarding world issues politics trash

all addicted to sugary drinks; soda, sweet tea, gatorade, fruit juices

will leave plate of food unattended and run off do something else and answer the phone while eating then go back later eat stuff that flies have landed on ..will not cover the plate 

People I know have these characteristic traits

 has places for cats and or other animals all over the house and outside. does not clean the spaces the animals sleep in.

his face in the screen be it tv television cell phone computer when i am talking to him ..mls plays computer chess often or looks at multitudes of websites while having a "conversation" which is no real talking at all 

won't look me in the eye very often..looks at anything else but my face

clutters up spaces makes piles of stuff anywhere they live or have access to such as other people's storage spaces like sheds or houses

eats stuff that is convenient and tastes good not thinking about how healthy it is 

loses temper fast over any little thing

drives too fast, cusses out other drivers, likes to take the highway.

always in a hurry to get there wherever it is or may be 

gets upset pissed off over any item being moved around

throws temper tantrums over any item being tossed into the garbage 

hangs onto old and useless things thinking he might use it later 

watches me with close eye when i am cleaning which requires moving things around then gets pissed off if any piece of furniture or any item is moved or tossed into the trash

calls me bad names like naive gullible stupid worthless "you dont know what you are talking about" "i dont understand you" "why dont you just shut the fuck up and leave me alone!" 

paces around the room when i am eating to see what i have and grabs something i have or off my plate thinking this is normal behavior. usually does not do this to other people just me. why?

leaves their plate of food open uncovered while eating then jumps up answer the phone or runs off doing something else leaving the meal unattended while flies land on it or maybe the dog or cat or other animal jumps up onto the counter and gets into the food  

loses temper when loses at board games like monopoly chess etc

 

Hooker wore slt cnt btch slve he treats women like this

 pops in a nasty "movie" video when the urge hits. also watches girls doing aerobics, dancing, stripping on stage, porn .
tells me i am disgusting to watch when i dance and i am to keep my body covered up and never move in any "provocative" way ..even doing squats, never show any skin even on my legs

Maintaining chaos and ARGUMENTS some people do

 saying i don't understand, i can't believe, i can't understand
asking same old questions over and over hearing answers never listening or comprehending
habits they do constantly, unable to change behaviors that are destructive, annoying to others, unhealthy, definitely creatures of habit
convictions beliefs are fixed, unchangeable to them
dense obtuse thick skull, stubborn
memorize bits of info and trivia like an encyclopedia yet have serious trouble with simple things like cleaning up after self, organization, future consequences of words and actions..the long term effects of their thoughts and behaviors

I walk away and leave him in is mess, just the way he left it and likes it.

 trash piled up everywhere. inside each room in the house and in the yard. around the house. he piles up stuff and crams things into spaces making it difficult if not impossible to find things and to clean. cardboard boxes are one of his favorite containers. any type of containers that are solid and unmatched. unmarked. can't see what is in them. stashing sh**t all over the house in each room, in the shed in the backyard, in the storage area he built next to the house, in the neighbors shed across the street. 

dirt, filth, bugs, cobwebs, mold, mildew, must, creatures living in areas because they have covered up spaces they can hide in. 

no amount of me talking has done any good.

U Can't Touch this song danced to at flea summer 2000

 not long after I had surgery, tubal ligation and uterine ablation 

john layson danced, too. only time i saw him dance. he tried but didnt have good rhythm

Fixed in thinking and habits

 Food remains same. No changes

Types of videos watched same

Music preferences same

Furniture stays in one place

Has sex same way most of the time

Changes in scenery location not liked

Movement of objects in house or business not liked unless he she does it

Sees no need to change things

Dislikes deep cleaning house bathroom kitchen garage bedroom basement because requires moving everything in room

Surface spot cleans isolated small areas

Upset easily if i change my hair 

Upset if i change clothes esp when out not at home

Watches people closely esp those not living in house

The lonesome loser song good one for the list

Those who expect me to be available at the drop of a hat...

 and cater to their whims of the moment

they don't give me much notice or no notice about anything

expect me to do what they want and be available instantly yet they will drag on and on when i want them to do something and will come up with any excuse in the world to avoid doing what i like or want or need

they refuse to do things with me that i like

scream at me stuff like fix me something to eat!  clean it up!

say stuff like it's no big deal, i dont care what you think or what you want, that is stupid, what are you, a moron? 

He said I dont have enough space and he filled up all his space at home and rented 3 large storage units

 john william layson

self fulfilling prophecy