When I think I got rid of the troublemaker(s) another one pops up

He makes sure he gets what he wants. His priorities are

Songs go through my head constantly

 A certain song starts usually when I wake up then a small chorus part of it goes around in my brain all day long.

The cure is usually playing that song a few times off YouTube then it releases and the next day or hour another song pops into my head 

Today it's "the old man is down the road" John Fogerty

Closed minded and open minded. Him and me.

I feel like I have to write all my thoughts down. Always have.

 Since I began a diary when I was a little girl. 9 or 10

NEVER get with someone just because they appear to look good and the sex is great!!!!!

 Advice to my younger self and to anyone anywhere regardless of age.

Slow down. Take your time. Get to really know the person. Listen to what they say about other people and how they treat strangers. How do they get along with their family? How does he treat his mother? His sisters, brothers, cousins, uncles, aunts.  Does he talk about and treat women differently than he treats men? 

What do they say about these people behind their backs?

What kinds of associates, friends, buddies, companions does he have? What do they share in common?

This reveals their true feelings about life in general and what kind of a person they are.

The males I ended up with brag, are egotistical, not very clean about their body. They have disgusting habits like nose picking, picking at nose, toenails, petting animals, touching virtually anything and transferring the germs all over the place. Greasy handprints all over doors, doorknobs, cabinets, refrigerator, appliances, handles, furniture.  Picking up the nastiest stuff on the road or anywhere and bringing it home and not cleaning things properly.  Buying or getting used clothing and not washing it first.  Not scrubbing their bodies properly. Some didn't even brush their teeth. 
Sucking up pornography on paper and videos on tapes or dvds or on screen thru paid tv services.

Reusing old towels, paper towels, napkins. Sleeping in dirty linens bedding sheets blankets comforters sleeping bags. Throwing trash out in the yard. Leaving tools, equipment, anything laying around in the yard, the house, the driveway, anywhere.  

Leaving and making dirty messes of dishes in the kitchen sink. Griming up the countertops, the bathroom sink, toilet and shower or bath tub and not caring that it looks black and stinks of rotten mold bacteria.  

Ignoring whatever I say about hygiene, cleanliness. Causing bug problems and telling me it is no big deal to have flies, mosquitoes, stink bugs, roaches, june bugs, moths, spiders virtually any type of insect crawling or flying around the premises and inside the house. Feeding animals anywhere like tossing food on the patio, the middle of the yard and leaving bones where I walk so I could step on them. Tossing old cans of food in the middle of the backyard.

Not cleaning out trash/garbage cans. When the smell gets bad he cannot figure out where it is coming from so this one I am with actually sprayed furniture polish on the kitchen counters and expected me to prepare food on it.

They hate the smell of cleaners and disinfectants like bleach clorox lysol vinegar.

They/he sneak off to do dirty deeds like viewing hardcore porn when he thinks I am asleep or not around.

Body builder at the gym told me I was every man's dream. Other people say I am fit and in great shape

Last month in May this guy named Alex at the gym said I was every man's dream. He was very helpful and gentemanly to me, never making a pass or asking me for sex. It is one of the unwritten "rules" of the fitness centers and gymnasiums to not make passes at people.

Alex said my core was in great shape. solid.. he showed me how to use the bosu ball and several exercises

In April 2026 I took a walk north on crestview drive in my neighborhood. The neighbor, Mark hollered at me to come over up to the front porch and talk. His roommate named John said I was in great condition, beautiful and asked me what my secret was/secrets are. He asked "Does your husband tell you how great you look?" 
I said "No. He hardly ever tells me I look good."

At another gym in April I went in and sat on the rowing machine. The man next to me on a machine said jokingly "Don't make me look bad" I said "What do you mean?" He said, "You look fit to me and I am afraid you will outdo me and make me look bad."