so conscientious wanting to be absolutely perfect due to my upbringing primarly grandma/grandmother who wanted the best for me and all of her family
i was a total nervous wreck when anyone was watching me
applying for a job ..the man asked to watch me use the 10 key adding machine and i was distraught barely able to hit the right keys and ended up tearing up/crying
is this one big reason actors/actressed are so valuable admired sought after paid so much money because they flash in front of the camera doing almost anything with ease..as if no one is watching, and if they are watching, they don't care one bit
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