I have hope. He has skeptism. 

 I am the only one to deal with my self and my life's experiences. No one is going to save me, help me, protect me, encourage me. Hope houses are a joke. 

Pretty women. Admire, lust after, Look at them in pictures and videos. don't look at me.

throw me a crumb once in awhile to string me along

rarely hug or kiss me

compare me to other women all of the time

say you love me cant live without me one minute

next minute throw me away like a piece of trash

Disrespect me. Ignore me. Tell me to shut up. Tell me I am stupid.

Tell me I don't do anything, I don't work. Try to make me feel

worthless. This has been going on for almost 29 years

and now realizing it is nothing new with him.

narcissist psychopath

narcissistic behavior

psychopathic 

lacks empathy

controlling

Pictures of my back. October 4, 2020

 Back

Back Picture 1

Back Picture 2

Back Picture 3

Back Picture 4

Books and tools. A book is useless if you don't understand it like a tool is useless if you don't know how to use it.

Books and tools. A book is useless if you don't understand it like a tool is useless if you don't know how to use it.  

See in others first what I see in myself.

 See in others first what I see in myself.

Internal dialogue equals external results.

 Internal dialogue equals external results.