Buying products that have names to make one thing very little work is involved
Friday, September 30, 2022
The only place where your dream becomes impossible is in your own thinking." -- Robert Schuller
Your Daily Quotation:
"The only place where your dream becomes impossible is in your own thinking."
-- Robert Schuller
Thursday, September 29, 2022
Nocturnal me hasn't done well living with with early birds
Or working with them
I have no idea where I got being a night owl
Both my parents and grandparents were daytime people
Clean up, accounting main things in my life
brooms mops dishes
vacuum
sweep
organizing
my stuff and other people's stuff
hoarders those who don't want to clean anything up
they don't want to do that menial mundane type of work ...maybe they feel like they are above all of that
those who don't want to keep track of receipts and money spent
You Talk Too Much .. Joe Jones 1960
You talk too much, you worry me to death,
You talk too much, you even worry my pet.
You just talk, talk too much.
You talk about people that you don't know,
You talk about people wherever you go.
You just talk, talk too much.
You talk about people that you've never seen,
You talk about people, you can make me scream.
You just talk, you talk too much.
You Talk Too Much .. Joe Jones 1960
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sm2_6exVJuE
Child knows what they want and who they are. Brainwashing and indoctrination begins asap
indoctrination brainwashing of children, teens, adults
teaching conformity
sameness all should excel in all things and look and dress the same, eat same foods and same amounts
not allowing much for uniqueness and differences
focusing on the outside and not reflecting
outside focus (what is someone else doing)
comparing self to to another and gauging "success" upon competing
teaching us to "keep up with THEM, the "Jones'"
yourself is not good enough the way you are
you must be like so and so
Wednesday, September 28, 2022
Philosophy antonyms and synonyms
https://www.antonym.com/antonyms/philosophy
1. philosophy
noun. (fəˈlɑːsəfi) A belief (or system of beliefs) accepted as authoritative by some group or school.
Antonyms
internationalism nationalism monism imitation unbelief multiculturalism formalism pluralism
Synonyms
doctrine freethinking humanitarianism phenomenology ism absolutism
Etymology
philosophy (English)
philosophie (Anglo-Norman)
philosophia (Latin)
φιλοσοφία (Ancient Greek (to 1453))
φιλόσοφος (Ancient Greek (to 1453))
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2. philosophy
noun. (fəˈlɑːsəfi) The rational investigation of questions about existence and knowledge and ethics.
Antonyms
inactiveness actual sin falsehood inactivity Athanasianism Arianism common
Synonyms
transcendental philosophy dialectic legal philosophy logic law
Etymology
philosophy (English)
philosophie (Anglo-Norman)
philosophia (Latin)
φιλοσοφία (Ancient Greek (to 1453))
φιλόσοφος (Ancient Greek (to 1453))
3. philosophy
noun. (fəˈlɑːsəfi) Any personal belief about how to live or how to deal with a situation.
Antonyms
unbelief disloyalty
Synonyms
belief
Etymology
philosophy (English)
philosophie (Anglo-Norman)
philosophia (Latin)
φιλοσοφία (Ancient Greek (to 1453))
φιλόσοφος (Ancient Greek (to 1453))
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The most important thing in communication is to hear what isn't being said." -- Peter F. Drucker
Your Daily Quotation:
"The most important thing in communication is to hear what isn't being said."
-- Peter F. Drucker
Philos philosophy
philosophy definition from antonym dot com
2. philosophy
noun. (fəˈlɑːsəfi) The rational investigation of questions about existence and knowledge and ethics.
Antonyms
inactiveness actual sin falsehood inactivity Athanasianism Arianism common
Synonyms
transcendental philosophy dialectic legal philosophy logic law
================================================================
Philos wants what is needed
appropriate adequate amounts "just right"
is not greedy
philos knows there is abundance
accepts others for what they are what it is
Understands .. seeks understanding
Solitude and reflection is practiced willingly
Politics is avoided . Philos is aware of such and chooses other activities
Teaching, arts, crafts, music, dancing, gymnastics, swimming, writing, author, authoring, books, movies, plays
Writes, talks, speaks, socializes with most beings whether it is human or other kinds of animals, beings, plants, "inanimate" such as rocks, stones, metal, cement any type of element
Solo activities alone and enjoyed tremendously
Observes the whole as well as the individual
See connections the connected of all it senses with the 5 physical senses and understands
the unseen unheard not smelled the invisible is real, the reality of which comprises the majority
of energy ..rays, and radio waves sound waves xrays gamma ultraviolet
The reality is the source energy/ energies
Radiation
IS
patient, understands, seeks to know and relate, kind, helpful, generous (wisely so)
wise,
TIME wise: past, present, future,
Reflects past
Aware of the now
Visions of future
DREAMS
ETHICAL
MEDITATES
FLEXIBLE
Round spiral swirling fluid cannot will not be shoved into a box .. any type of containment, restriction,
Does not PUSH, shove, force,
PROTECTIVE of other life forms
Appreciates, has gratitude
wants what they have, what they chose
Satisfied
Little things are the source, important, priority, ... is very content with small stuff and knows it makes the BIG things
NATURE is enjoyed, revels in the Natural
simple simplicity
pure fresh
unique original
Aware of self, focuses on what self is doing, feeling, thinking, needing, wanting
TIME understands things take time. Patient, waits without anxiety, frustration
Government
Employment Regulated Jobs Institutions Affiliations Bureaus
Schools Colleges Universities
Attorney Law Judicial
Airport airlines
Animal Control
Banks
City
County
State
Federal
Utilities
ATF
EPA
FCC
FDA
Fire
Police
IRS
Law
Insurance
Medical
Hospitals
Clinics
Drug stores Pharmarcies
Pharmaceutical companies
Military
Automobile production
Automobile related Licensing Sales
Trains
Parks & Recreation
Patent office
Zoo
Tuesday, September 27, 2022
Artist - Release ( Label) Cat # Status
4-Fun - You Can't Play Me (12", Promo) (EastWest Records America) DMD 1720
Al B. Sure! - Missunderstanding (12", Maxi) (Warner Bros. Records, Warner Bros. Records, Uptown Records) 0-21744, 9 21744-0
Alex Brown - (Come On) Shout (12") (Mercury) 880 694-1
Alphaville - Romeos (12", Single, Promo) (Atlantic) DMD 1318
(5) Alta Dustin - Lookin' For Love (12", Maxi, Promo) (Atlantic) DMD 1636
Angie St. Phillips* - Light Up My Heart (12") (TSR Records) TSR842
Apollo Smile - Let's Rock (12", Maxi, Promo) (A&M Records) SP-17828
B-Fats - I Found Love (12") (Orpheus Records) V-72675
Baby S - Street Fractions (2xLP, Album, Promo) (Ruthless Records) E2S 56785
(10) Basic Black - What Ever It Takes (12", Single, Promo) (Sound Of New York) L33-1091
Beats International - Echo Chamber (12", Promo) (Go! Beat, Elektra) ED 5532
Blaze - So Special (12", Promo) (Motown) L33-1043
Bobbi Humphrey - Let's Get Started (12", Promo) (Warner Bros. Records) PRO-A-4354
Bobby Rydell - Will You Be My Baby (7", Single) (Cameo) C-252
(15) Bow Wow Wow - Baby, Oh No / Cowboy (12") (RCA Victor) PD-13306
The Boys - A Little Romance (12", Promo) (Motown) L33-17896
The Boys - Thanx 4 The Funk (12", Promo) (Motown) L33-1147
The Boys - Thanx 4 The Funk (12", Promo) (Motown) L33-1147
Cherrelle - You Look Good To Me (12" Extended Dance Mix) (12", Pit) (Tabu Records) 4Z9 05279
(20) Chic - Rebels Are We (12", Promo) (Atlantic) DMD 241
Chris Jagger - Chris Jagger (LP, Album, Pre) (Asylum Records) SD 5069
Cinema (5) - New Girl Now (12", Promo) (A&M Records) SP-12283
The Controllers - Break Out The Love (12", Single) (MCA Records) MCA-23682
Curtains - That's What It Is (12", Promo) (Radar Records (14))
(25) Dead Or Alive - I'd Do Anything (Megamix) (12", Promo) (Epic) 49-04979
Deborah Harry - Sweet And Low (12", Maxi) (Sire, Red Eye, Reprise Records) 0-21446
Dimensional Sound - Disco Gold #4 (LP) (United (9), United (9)) US-7816, US 7816
Dreamboy - Contact (12", Maxi) (Qwest Records, Qwest Records) 0-20303, 9 20303-0 A
Eddy Grant - Going For Broke (LP, Album) (Portrait, Portrait) FR 39261, 39261
(30) Elliott Murphy - Texas / Out For The Killing (12", Maxi) (Closer Records) CL 1256
Eric Gable - Remember The First Time (12") (Orpheus Records) V-72681
Eve Gallagher - Love Is A Master Of Disguise (12", Promo) (Charisma) DMD 1819
Evelyn Thomas - Reflections (12") (Record Shack Records, Mega Records (5)) RSD-6955
Ex-Girlfriend - You (You're The One For Me) (12", Promo) (Reprise Records) PRO-A-4981
(35) Ex-Sample - And So It Goes (12") (Wide Angle) TTW 87133
Full Force - Unselfish Lover (12") (Columbia) 44-05333
Garland Jeffreys - Hail Hail Rock 'N' Roll (12", Promo) (RCA) RDAB-62175-1
Genevha - Life In The Movies (12") (CBS Associated Records) 4Z9-06961
Girls Can't Help It - Baby Doll (12", Maxi) (Sire, Sire) 0-29773 (Labels), 9-29773-0 A
(40) Glen Goldsmith - You've Got Me Dancin (12", Promo) (RCA) 9107-1-RDAB
The Golden Palominos - The Animal Speaks (12", Single) (Celluloid) CEL 190
Grady Harrell - Fun (12", Promo) (RCA) 9010-1-RDXCD
Inner City - That Man (He's All Mine) (2x12", Promo) (Virgin) DMD 1567
Isis - Rebel Soul / Face The Bass (12", Promo) (4th & Broadway) 440 513-0 DJ
(45) Ernie Isley, Chris Jasper, Marvin Isley* - Look The Other Way (12") (CBS Associated Records, Magic Sound Productions) 4Z9-05109
Jagged Edge Featuring Jermaine Dupri - Stunnas (12", Promo) (Columbia, Sony Urban Music)
Jamie J. Morgan - Walk On The Wild Side (12") (Tabu Records) 4Z9 73164
Jean Beauvoir - Gamblin Man (12", Single, Promo) (Columbia) CAS 1169
Jeanna Cie - Red Light, Green Light (12") (MCA Records) MCA-23878
(50) The Jim Carroll Band - Dry Dreams (LP, Album, Promo) (ATCO Records) SD 38-145
Crazy Joe* & The Variable Speed Band - Wild Thing (12", Promo) (Chance Records (7)) CH 1301
John Cafferty And The Beaver Brown Band - C-I-T-Y (12", Single, Promo) (Scotti Bros. Records) ZAS 2140
Joyce "Fenderella" Irby - Mr. D.J. (12", Promo) (Motown) L33-17777
JT Money - Hi-lo (12", Promo) (Priority Records) SPRO 81449
(55) Kathy Kosins - I've Got The Night Off (12") (Carrere USA) 4Z9 05996
Keith & Darrell - Work That Body (12", Single, Promo) (Motown) 4516MG
Kenny Loggins - Vox Humana (12", Promo) (Columbia) CAS 2041
Kim Dorell - Micro-Man (12") (OZ Magical Music) OC-101762
Kui Lee - The Extraordinary Kui Lee (LP) (Columbia) CS 9403
(60) Kwick - Shake Till Your Body Break (12", Promo) (EMI America) SPRO 9732
La Toya Jackson - Imagination (12") (CBS Associated Records) 4Z9-05389
Laura Branigan - Satisfaction (12") (Atlantic) 0-86914
Lil' Zane - None Tonight / What's Up (12", Maxi, Promo) (Priority Records) SPRO-81441
Loreta - Trouble With Boys (12") (Reprise Records, Reprise Records) 0-44790, 9 44790-0
(65) Love & Sas - Call My Name (12", Promo) (RCA, RCA) RDAC-62236-1, 07863 62236-1
Lydia Rhodes - DJ Give Me That Funky Bass (12") (MCA Records) MCA-24027
Matthew Todd - Heartbeat (12", Single) (DMM Records) DMO-9300
MC Hammer - (Hammer Hammer) They Put Me In The Mix / Cold Go M.C. Hammer (12", Single) (Capitol Records) V-15460
MC Shan - Ain't It Good To You (12", Promo) (Cold Chillin') PRO-A-4391
(70) Missy Elliott - Teary Eyed / Joy (12", Promo) (Atlantic) PR 301896
Nancey Jackson - Free (Yes I'm Free) (12") (Harmony Records (6)) 88561-1656-1
New Choice - At Last (LP, Album) (Warner Bros. Records) 1-25752
No Face - Hump Music (12", Promo) (Great Jones) GJ-603 DJ
Nu Sounds* - Condition Red (12") (UNI Records) UNI-8016
(75) Omar Chandler - Do You Really Want It (12", Single) (MCA Records, MCA Records) MCA12-53905, MCA12 53905
Party Posse - Keep Dancin' / Strivin' (12") (Jive) 1212-1-JD
Patti Austin - Honey For The Bees (12", Maxi) (Qwest Records) 0-20361
Patti LaBelle - Winner In You (LP, Album, Pin) (MCA Records) MCA-5737
Patty Weaver - Shot In The Dark (12", Promo) (Warner Bros. Records) PRO A 1034
(80) Pebbles - Take Your Time (Extended Remix) (12", Single) (MCA Records) MCA-23882
Perri - I Don't Wanna Lose Your Love (12") (Zebra Records, MCA Records) ZEB 7289, ZEB-23813
Philly's Most Wanted - Cross The Border / Suckas Pt.2 (For Da’ Gansta’s) (12", Promo) (Atlantic) DMD 2570
Phyllis Nelson - Don't Stop The Train (12", Single) (Carrere) 8.091
Poppa Ron Love - I'm A Girl Watcher (12", Promo) (Def Jam Recordings) 44-68783
(85) René And Angela* - Save Your Love (For #1) (12") (Mercury) 880 731-1
Renegade Foxxx - Scream (Get It Right) Remix / Anything U Want (12", Promo) (Still Hustlin Records)
Rich Nice - So What You Gotta Man (12", Promo) (Motown) L33-18326
Scandalous Featuring M.J. White* - Still Irresistible (12", Promo) (Atlantic) DMD 1646
She Rockers - On Stage / Get Up On This (12", Promo) (Jive) 1197-1-JDAB
(90) Short Dawg - Cruzin (12") (Russell Simmons Music Group)
Slaughter House (5) - Yaw Don't Know / That's Goin Be A Problem (12", Promo) (Slaughterhouse Music (2))
Steel Pulse - Reaching Out (12", Single) (MCA Records) MCA-23894
Stephanie Mills - In My Life (12") (Club) JABX 9
T.O.N.E. - Rumors 2002 (12", Promo) (Select Records) 95078-1
(95) Tevin Campbell - Round And Round (12", Maxi) (Paisley Park, Warner Bros. Records) 9 21740-0, 0-21740
Then Jerico - The Motive (12", Single, Promo) (MCA Records, London Records) L33-17577
Tina Turner - Let's Stay Together / I Wrote A Letter (12", Single, Pic) (Capitol Records) V-8579
Today - Why You Get Funky On Me (12", Promo) (Motown) L33-18185
Tomi Jenkins - Telling You How It Is (12", Single) (Elektra) 0-66699
(100) Twelve-88 - Uh Huh (12", Promo) (Select Street Records) 95072-1
V.H.F. - Love In The Night (12", W/Lbl) (Record Shack Records) SOHOT 75
Various - Denim (LP, Album, Comp) (K-Tel) WU 3560
Viola Wills Ashmun* - Space (12") (RVA Records) RVA 1001 RE
(104) Westside (5) - Jungle Love (12", Single) (MCA Records) MCA-23509
THE ABOVE RECORD LOT OF 104
LISTED ON OFFERUP 9-25-2022
************************************************
************************************************
Gladys Knight & The Pips* - Between Her Goodbye And My Hello (7", Single) (Soul) S 35111F
Earl Grant - Sweet Sixteen Bars (7", Single, Pin) (Decca) 25574
Dick Curless - China Nights (Shina No Yoru) / Old Bob Burton (7") (Capitol Records) 3630
Jumpin' Gene Simmons* - Haunted House / Hey, Hey Little Girl (7", Single, Styrene) (Hi Records) 45-2076
(9-27-22 put on ebay) Next Issue - Dear Mr. President (CD, Single, Promo) (Epic) ESK 74397)
Dan Fogelberg - Next Time (7", Promo) (Epic, Full Moon) 8-50165
(9-27-22 put on ebay) Various - Original Movie Themes (10xCD, Comp + Box) (Documents) 231888
You're not going to change the nature of a child, man, woman or any other life form
Fighting results when another attempts to strip the natural state of the being
Sunday, September 25, 2022
MD MORE DRUGS Some do this for a living, at their job/career or on the Streets
Synthetically produced manmade drugs pharmaceuticals
Until you make peace with who you are, you'll never be content with what you have." -- Doris Mortmanin to do
Daily Quotation:
"Until you make peace with who you are, you'll never be content with what you have."
-- Doris Mortmanin to do
Too much stuff, not finishing projects, thoughts or sentences = FRUSTRATION
anger
madness
insanity
misery
hate
frustrated
pissed
upset
anxious
Saturday, September 24, 2022
Nocturnal by nature I am.
since a child am a night person
naturally tend to be more active at night and dead in the morning for at least 2 hours
memories as far back as age 5 or 6 when living in California. they (parents, grandparents) put me to bed at 8 pm or so and I lay awake in bed in the dark hearing the tv playing until after the 10 o'clock news was over before finally going to sleep
stared at ceiling in total darkness and saw groups of different colored light specks moving around on the ceiling from one side of the room to the other when I was 5 years old. Have no idea what those light forms are/were. Still don't know.
currently self medicate with food to induce sleep in order to attempt to wake up early. so i will wake up early 2, 3 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 am then pee and go back to bed ... If I get up and stay up I have to take a nap
coffee plain when i get up which I quit for a few years back in 2016 and switched to hot tea due having gastritius and duodenitis (ulcers, very painful in my side)
now that that right side pain is not so bad I am back to drinking black coffee when I get up then iced tea and lots of water the rest of the day
now that that right side pain is not so bad I am back to drinking black coffee when I get up then iced tea and lots of water the rest of the day
woke at 731 am today only to return to sleep until 1030 am
1036 pm now and wide awake .. don't want to have to eat this early to start the
sleepy inducing process
have done many different things over the years
used to drink alcohol
take antihistamine such as diphenhydramine or benadryl which dryes me out and can take up ro 2 hours to induce sleep
passion flower
sleep gummies with melatonin (don't work very well)
the absolute best is to stay up naturally until I get tired then go to sleep and wake up refreshed even if it is noon
circadian rhythm
metabolism
what are they ?
tired of having to have caffeine
what if I lived so I did not have to rely of caffeine products or eat a bunch of food or drink a bunch of alcohol and take pills just to sleep?
Thursday, September 22, 2022
Tuesday, September 20, 2022
How can a person do something without thinking about it?
especially a job, work
any activity or thing is THOUGHT about
Monday, September 19, 2022
Saturday, September 17, 2022
Friday, September 16, 2022
Distractions stop creativity creations. Serious consequence of allowing deferment from thoughts and goals.
What this power is I cannot say; all I know is that it exists and it becomes available only when a man is in that state of mind in which he knows exactly what he wants and is fully determined not to quit until he finds it."
-- Alexander Graham Bell
When I allow anyone or thing to interrupt I can't finish what I aim to find
focus is stopped, a deter is made, off track happens, the thing i want to do does not get done
Jwl Layson music man kc
Scimecas 1st meal spaghetti italian food jan 2000
jan 2000 to september 2008
goal to clean the music store up.
worked in a disasterized mess the whole time. anytime i or anyone cleaned up and organized john blew up and messed it up. just like his hoarder house.. crammed from floor to ceiling. shelves stacked upon shelving, extension cords plugged into endless cords and power strips into more strips .. the endless of anything imaginable
working was extremely difficult. concentration and focus almost nil
john ended up staying one most of the days while i worked by myself. he was out buying more and as much as possible every day, packing, jamming the store to the hilt
he had 3 large storage spaces at the flea he paid rent on until 2021. who knows how much money the flea made off john for his storage payments
as soon as i started at the super flea in early 2000 he said i should sign up with ebay and sell his stuff music movies books electronics anything he bought for resale
oct 1999 i got my first computer at best buy and circuit city so i could learn how to use it on the internet. i wanted to know how to use it so i could work at office jobs like accounting bookeeping
after a few years he began using his computer to burn cds and dvds movies and copy tapes anything to sell to customers to make money. he copied artwork also. the results were poor. he insisted i do it, i refused due to infringments and laws which he avoided like the plague and said i was worried about nothing, as usual, minimizing what ever i said about
doing the right things, cleaning items things and the store up. the floors were nasty, the trash cans filthy, dirt, greasy grease nasty stuff sticky floors and merchandise and cds records with scratches cracks other flaws didnt bother him in the least
every saturday and sunday i worked at super flea with john and
it was always a fight, fighting at work every weekend with him. sloppiness, stinky stuff, dirt, grim, disorder, clutter, the back counter so crammed i could barely get around to get behind the counter so after a couple of years i about gave up and laid in a recliner chair the first hour or two then crawled over to the tall office chair and sat there behind my computer screen with the notebook at the counter to hand write down the sales in columns
i am told by him you act like this is a business it is not and husband tells me to shut the f up and just do your job he is paying you 40 dollars a day at first then a big raise to 50 a day because i drove him all over town on saturday evenings after working all day so he could buy more stuff at pawn shops thrift stores and the like
and i ended up picking him up at home and taking him to work then driving him home each sat and sunday after he quit driving, couldnt drive his car anymore which he never answered the question "john, why cant you drive anymore? why did you lose your drivers license?" all these years he never did say, he just said one time "its complicated" any other time he zipped his lips played opposum like he was dead and changed the subject
couldn't clean up and organize he destroyed whatever i did. we had part time briefly a few months total maybe .. some help from a couple of other ladies jacque and bree he tore up their work, also. jacque ended up living with john for a few years until 2020 or 2021 when she went to a nursing home after getting alzheimer's disease . before she got real bad with her mind she told me she hated john's guts, couldn't stand him. she would email me with his shenanigans and talk to me on the phone and a few times in person letting me know what was going on there at the house
went to visit johns a few times could barely walk thru the house, it was no big deal at all to him. i felt like a panic attack hitting me whenever i entered. the cat piss smell was overwhelming and tiptoeing like a snake thru the 3 bd ranch home with a full basement was the only way to get thru it alive
i didnt know what he really was until 2021 after i researched it; he was a hoarder, in stage 4 of hoarding disorder.
prior to this me and my husband and any other person who knew him just thought he was dirty, messy, a collector, a buyer and seller of merchandise
summer 2021 john told me you like to talk you should write you need to write books sarah . he was in the hospital had a heart attack death was imminent .
john lessons. i learned i must have courage and patience of a saint, strength of will like hardly any other person i know who would not put up with john's habits, treatement, crap. most would walk away the very first time he shot his filthy mouth off with shit flying out of it at me. screaming at me for a drop of water on the floor i mopped, raging at me for throwing a piece of water damaged rotten cardboard into the trash can at work at super flea... his yelling at me and rage was so loud and bad that a man customer walked by when john was raging at me. the man looked at me said i will take him out right now for you ...no man should talk to a woman that way!!
working with men and married to men who didnt always do or want to do the right things .. the right things for me and most people anyway. conniving and cheating might be the right thing for them and some others. and somehow i manage to be clean, seemingly untouched and remain an angel as some say that i am.
it's not all bad, though. there are and were many good things experienced learned and had out of the tsunami war zone hurricane earthquake situations i have lived thru; some of the biggest disasters and messes a person could go there i have done, been in. survived.
story of my life.. here
my ex acted and was the same way and current hub is just as bad as all that and somehow i manage to still be alive with a tiny shred of sanity left in my poor little half wit kind hearted doormat soul
i wonder at times if i must be insane. .. yes i must be a fool. a fool's fool to put up with ass hole behaviors such as theirs
{cussing me out, threatening me, tearing the hell out of things, minimizing any ethical word that comes out of my mouth, dominating dictator hitler types, pigs, control freaks, cutting corners, cutting me down, causing tons of unnecessary work and making one hours work turn into 100 hours work, ...}
well the truth is i had hope. i really foolishly thought i could clean it up, that was my mission. i had a goal and in the beginning i tried for 9 years couldnt do it but waited gave up finally in 2021 after i left that hell hole pit in 2008 (13 years later) johns house got cleaned up and out, it's all gone. he lost it all, the entire contents and the house.
i also foolishly thought people, a person could change. and now i know the truth; they wont change one iota, bit, fraction, micron, ounce or any other measure a person can name. a person is what they are. they arent going anywhere you think they will go or want them to go. it is their life, their plan and mission to do precisely what the sam hell they want to do. it's not my business. they dont want to be fixed, told what to do, what they should think, say feel or want to be doing or going.
john and others
pushy, all about the money, material things, drive fast, get it all as fast as possible, fast food probably fast women and fast cars. impatient. demanding, yelling. accumulate stuff dont want to let go of things.
Thursday, September 15, 2022
Wednesday, September 14, 2022
Some are "I knew you could do it" after the fact. "You can't do it" and blocking you every step of the way before the fact.
pretending to have faith prior to but never did have confidence in your ability
this is lying
2 timing
Knowing what you are dealing with makes it easier to deal
Truths
cares only about what he thinks I am and should be, do, think, act
throws up walls, block, objections to things I think, want, am say, do, wear,
becomes irate throws fits
says you can't do that you don't have the money, i'm not paying for it
how are you going to do that?
i don't want you to blankety blank
i dont understand why
My purpose: sex object, roommate, house sitter, caretaker, sidekick without much say in any important thing around here at the house
house, utilities in his name only
Tuesday, September 13, 2022
Monday, September 12, 2022
Anybody everybody nobody and or somebody is screwed up thinking
I hear these words frequently from a person and people who are confused anxiety fearful paranoid crazy nuts unsure uncertain
Chicken shit
Cowards cowardly
Mixed up
Screwy
Screwed
Don't know what to do
Think in terms of should
anonymous people without names or identity includes anybody anyone any man any woman, everybody, everyone, someone, somebody.... nameless faceless meaningless OBJECTS like puppets dolls stepword wives or husbands
This type of thinking is insane.
I was told that I don't exist by another person (a female woman sister in law when I first met her in 1991, Dorothy was her name) who grew up in household using these same words that attempt to include every single person or no person in a group, activity, thought process or any other method of a life form.
I cried when my grandson was 5 because I knew kindergarten was next. I am still crying.
I cried when my grandson was 5 because I knew kindergarten was next. I am still crying.
He knows what he loves and wants. Society is about conformity to achieve a "norm" that is not about the individual.
It's about melting a person down into a huge pot of sameness with all of the others.
Attempting to strip the individual's identify away.
Children are unique. They need to stay that way. Into adulthood.
The people who maintain their SELF are the most recognized, become famous and sometimes rich in wealth. Artists, engineers, all of the fields of endeavor. The ones who blend into the mix and lose their sense of identify by trying to please everyone go down the drain.
Not be whipped into submission to conform into a blase standard of nothingness.
Sunday, September 11, 2022
My mom used to talk about schizos often
She would mention family members or others she knew and tell me how they would switch from Dr. Jekyll to Mr. Hyde suddently.
I live with a schizophrenic individual and have experienced many others in his family with the same mental and emotional state of mind.
My mother passed away in December of 2003, 19 years ago...going on 20 years.
She was a calm, stable, very nice person.
Saturday, September 10, 2022
Friday, September 9, 2022
Thursday, September 8, 2022
I go through this alone navigating life by myself
Feels that way however it might be the solo footprints on the sand
and the invisible source energy is carrying me through all of it
Wednesday, September 7, 2022
Black and red, my favorite colors
Black no color, death. Halloween neutral, goes with any color combination,
Red blood, heart valentine's day, root Chakra, energy, vitality, source, life
Sex sensuality passion obsession sensuality
Animal vitality
Rough sex
Intense intensity
https://www.color-meanings.com/
Burning passion
Monday, September 5, 2022
11 Secrets To Success
11 Secrets To Success
1. Attitude
2. Health (100%)
3. Stop listening to negative people
4. Make life a game
5. Take action
6. Ask questions
7. Stop thinking "job"
8. Write things down. Lists
9. Get rid of ugly friends and family
10. Make the most of everyday
11. Do for other and get excited about it
Sunday, September 4, 2022
Saturday, September 3, 2022
Cataracts: Finally found out today vision problems having is probably this
Accidentally found out today by clicking on discover links in the internet that the eye issues are most likely cataract formation.
In 2016 presbyopia diagnosis and
football shape lens astigmatism
https://smarterconsumer.net/learn-6-types-of-laser-eye-surgery/?sd=czuqqcbojqhincnt
Exchange of Refractive Lens
Refractive Lens Exchange (RLE) is a popular eye operation for persons suffering from presbyopia, a common age-related disorder that causes progressive loss of near vision before progressing to cataract. Your surgeon replaces your malfunctioning natural lens with a quality intraocular lens engineered to enhance focusing power at near, moderate, and long distances during an RLE treatment. RLE not only decreases or eliminates the need for glasses, bifocals, and/or readers, but it also inhibits the development of cataracts in the future.
https://www.aao.org/eye-health/diseases/what-are-cataracts
https://eyemountain.com/vision-before-and-after-cataract-surgery/
https://astigmatismtreatment.net/astigmatism-causes/
https://www.aao.org/eye-health/diseases/what-are-cataracts
double vision
blurry vision
halos around the moon
I see two moons at night
can't see small fine details
Need to go to eye doctor immediately
Every time we open our mouths, men look into our minds." -- Author Unknown
Every time we open our mouths, men look into our minds."
-- Author Unknown
Love is desired by most
love is wanted
but not to be had by force
it's either there or it's not
i remember some who asked
do you love me...
it's a question that should not be asked
some demanded i say it (I love you)
they needed to hear the words
i dont say it unless i mean it
it's a choice not a forced thing
are you loved because of what you do?
or simply because you exist, you are there?
because you are you, the thing is what it is
who you are
what you are
are you loved because you love something else?
are you loved because you love a person, a thing, place, activity?
are you loved because you love what you do, love yourself, love life, love a thing,
are you loved because you dont care if anyone loves you
you dont demand love from a person....
you're nonchalant, free spirited, self willed, focused on life/living and enjoying yourself
Oblivious
Unaware of anyone looking, listening, paying attention
Role: caretaker, care giver
for jo ann sister in law
damon grandson
john friend co-worker 22 years ago
chuck strand next door neighbor of john. chuck died
Thursday, September 1, 2022
Slow to realize things; me
Son
Thinks I am trash and anything I have own do think say is trash
Disrespectful
Said you're not special. You're not my role model
Smirks, skeptical is whatever I say
Mocks me
Makes fun of me
Says I am lying to his son
Invalidates, minimizes, ridicules, looks down on me
Spends lots of time with his father on the phone and in person
I embarrass him
Spends no time with me during holidays and stays away from / avoids me
When I am at his house or anywhere else
Does not come over to visit with me period
Is not one it proud of me
Acts disgusted in my presence
Probably secretly hates despises me although he said I love you one time
In August 2022
Enjoys breaking your train of thought concentration . Narc
Won't let you finish talking
Asks often unrelated questions while another person is speaking
Interrupts your speech actions activities , will not tolerate being stopped interrupted
Shocks surprises by sneak attacks... Enjoys scaring you me people.. watches frightened reactions with glee
Laughs at your suffering, mistakes, falls, lack of knowledge , pain
Gloats in having knowledge you don't have, feels superior because of this
Blocks sets up roadblocks, says I told you so, you should have known , you can't do that
Must have control final say
Won't tolerate different any thing
Vain.
Easily embarrassed.
Jumps to conclusions. Assumes.
Females girls women advice for life from a man
Females/girls/women advice for life from a man
straight talk, out of the mouth of a 61 year old man yesterday I met at a nursing home born in june of 1961
Dress appropriately, covering yourself. Dont show too much
Thinks woman is trying to turn him off seduce him by the way she is dressed, acts, talks
Halter tops and shorts are immediate turn on for him as are bikini swim suits, lingerie, underwear
Don't lean over showing any skin in chest area/breast/boobs/tits
Don't show your ass butt or anywhere close to personal crotch area
Don't hug men/him/males
Don't be too nice, friendly.
Use caution with words: Language shall be polite
He says he is turned on, stimulated very easily by viewing any female or if the person shall come too close and / or touch his body especially in private areas
Says is faithful for 34 years to wife; refuses to allow secumbing to having sex with anyone but wife
This type of thinking totally explains why I have not been taken seriously by man males men ..........this explains a whole lot of behavior that happens worldwide ................
Narc fights. The never ending feud battles of forcing oneself upon others.
One will beat you up and wear you out with stupid. Stupidity beats up intelligence and
wears out the other who participates in endless battles going nowhere.
1. Constantly asking the same questions over and over. daily, weekly, monthly...for years on end.
Not listening to the answers. Keep asking.
2. pretending like you or i dont understand to keep the shit going
3. feigning ignorance
4. "I don't understand" (I can't understand" (common sense things) are frequent statements
and demand an explanation which, of course, the recipient answers and the person keeps saying I can't/don't understand after the other explains in full detail why, who, what, where, when, how... all q's are answered and the narc feigns stupidity
5. Picks, prods, pokes, agitates, aggravates, demands yes or no answers to optional preferences which are individual choices THEN becoming irate if the person says yes or no in a decision that disagrees with what they poking prodding narc asks
6. Statements are ALL or NOTHING so one has no real choice to even think ..forced to believe that one (me, you or I) don't have a choice in the matter. The OTHER option of
NOT deciding yes or no is not allowed. Violence ensues "Goddmamit, you HAVE to be on this side or that one, you can't be in the middle and NOT choose one or the other!!!"
7. Keep saying fixed things which are opinions and saying that your opinion is a fact
no arguing with a fool
fools foolish argument is never ending
endless circular going nowhere no resolution no problem is solved. problems continue on and fighting is continual
push one and get resistance bucking fighting arguing yelling
One has to realize a thing on their own. We you I learn by ourselves.
We dont need to be pushed, forced and assisted by another.
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Doctor said I have no cataracts, no glaucoma and no macular degeneration which is good. He said my pupils were well dilated so he did not ha... -
am i really a failure? am i doing what i am able to do? OR am i unable to fit into other people's boxes, unable to keep up with dem...
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Any person I am talking to immediately diverts their attention to someone else or some animal or some other things in the area. They drop t...