Sunday, May 31, 2020

Saturday, May 30, 2020

A female instinctively loves babies just as a male instinctively wants to perform the act to make babies with as many pretty, beautiful females they can have/conquer.

A female instinctively loves babies just as a male
instinctively wants to
perform the act to make babies
with as many pretty, beautiful females they can have/conquer.

They want to perform the act but usually don't want the
babies, the offspring. They don't know how to take care
of babies.

They know how to be independent,
how to take care of themselves and perform the act.

Human males are uncontrollably drawn to healthy looking,
beautiful females.

They are drawn to beauty, sweet, innocent looking, vulnerable, accepting,
nice,  kind, cooperative, understanding,    females

They see everything around them at all times. They notice all.
They are tuned in to finding the beauty, always watching.
Always alert to any available opportunity to procreate
with a desirable female.

They love to see the activity of a female while she does anything.
They like to see physical movement and expressions.
Her mind and brains do not matter.
What she wants does not matter.
What he wants matters.

Having that ultimate climax with a young and healthy
fertile female is the strongest desire.
He continually searches for the best climax
even though he states "It can't get any better than this"

He will be with a beautiful female and experience
the "best" act and still search for an even better experience.
He is never satisfied.
No one woman will satisfy him.
He wants more women.


It supercedes all other desires.

The desire to own all of the land and money
and appear to have all of the knowledge/intelligence
is because he wants to have access to all of the best females
so he can perform the act of procreation
and continue his dna for future generations.

Duplication of the self through procreation.

He instinctively does what he does and knows not
why he does it.


"What a way to go", they all say. If they died of a heart
attack while climaxing it would be worth losing their life.

My husband said this a few days ago (again). "What a way to go!"
after he said he could have a heart attack from getting so excited.
(Because of the way I looked.)

I have heard this statement from many men during my lifetime.

I have seen countless news stories about very old men
getting with young women, some marrying them.

History is of full of stories including this topic.

My own lifetime is packed with experiences of having many
men and boys attempting to get that one thing from me.

Movies and songs are filled with the same message.

5-24-2020

Sarah-Wilson-Stillwell




The male is like a pump. Forcing, pushing forward. The female is like a vacuum. Allowing, pulling inward.


The male is like a pump. Forcing, pushing forward.
The female is like a vacuum. Allowing, pulling inward.


5-30-2020
Sarah Wilson Stillwell


A cat is a cat and is happy being a cat. It only knows how to be a cat.

A cat is a cat and is happy being a cat. It only knows how to be a cat.

 The cat does not pretend to be an elephant
or a dog or a horse or a human. the same way any
animal only knows how to be what it is.

Humans fail terribly when they attempt to do and be what they are not and push this
false belief onto other humans and animals.

5-30-2020
Sarah Wilson Stillwell


Every time in the past I have attempted to conform to the ideal of what someone else expected of me I failed and they stayed miserable and unfulfilled with their unreasonable and impossible expectations.

Every time in the past I have attempted to conform to the ideal of what
someone else expected of me I failed and they stayed miserable and unfulfilled
with their unreasonable and impossible expectations.

Every time I did something someone said I should do so I could be more like them,
I failed myself and did not satisfy their desires.

Every time I was naturally myself, my female self,
 I was appreciated, admired, adored and loved.

5-30-2020
Sarah Wilson Stillwell

When I am myself, when I have been only myself, I am loved for who I am. I can only be me. You can only be you.

When I am myself, when I have been only myself,
 I am loved for who I am. I can only be me. You can only be you.

If another person attempts to change me into something I am not
they are miserable and so am I. 

Each time I have attempted to force someone to change into
something I thought they should be or do we were both miserable, unhappy fools.

5-30-2020
Sarah Wilson Stillwell

Real woman. Real man.

Real women are loved by real men because he loves
a woman for what she is.
He doesn't try to turn her into a man.

Real men are loved by women because she loves a man
for what he is. She doesn't try to turn him into a woman.

5-30-2020
Sarah Wilson Stillwell

I am a woman. Not only do I look different from a man. My feelings are different. My emotions are different than a man's. I have different, feminine interests.

I am a woman.
Not only do I look different from a man. My feelings are different.
My emotions are different than a man's.
I have different, feminine interests.

5-30-2020
Sarah Wilson Stillwell

Don't send me to do a man's job. Dont expect me to be able to men's work.

Don't send me to do a man's job.
Dont expect me to be able to men's work.
I am a woman. I am a girl, a female. My body is
totally different than a male's body and my mind
is different in many ways.

I am not a contruction worker. I am not a tree trimmer.
I am not an auto mechanic. I am not an engineer.

I have done men's work in the past when the foolish idea
was going around that a woman is equal to a man and
can work like a man and do anything a man can do.
This erroneous idea was pushed into the media and
throughout families when I was a child, a teen and
a young adult. It still exists today. It is still
causing much distress, fights, wars and unhappiness
among people.

I personally experience my own physical abilities and
limitations every day, especially since I have become
older, now age 58. My physical strength is low.  My ability
to lift weight is low, around 10 pounds or so.

My interests are in reading, writing, health, nutrition, finding balance,
reasonable exercise such as walking, dancing and
swimming when I can, sharing helpful information with others,
socializing when I can. Reading books. Very light occasional
sewing of clothes. Cooking. Flexible meal "planning".
Doing the laundry.
Light house cleaning.


I personally witness my husband, now 59 years of old,
using power tools, chainsaws, table saws, using the vice,
using the pressure washer, using air compressors,
lawn mowers, vacuum cleaner repair and maintenance,
heavy duty
equipment, machinery, woodworking tools, planers,
jack hammers, batteries, battery cables, hole punch kits for belts,
tool and die kits, virtually anything involving the creating,
maintaining or destruction of any kind of material property
every day. He cuts wood, splits wood, stacks it, brings it
in the house, stokes the fire. He is a brick layer mason.
He repairs all of our automobiles as well as those owned
by other people we know.
He builds things like sheds, playground equipment at the park.
He knows how to change keys to fit a lock.
He removes and installs doors, windows, siding, flooring,
ceiling, plumbing, electrical, heating and air conditioning.
He is the handyman to the max. 
It is in his blood.
He is all male. He is a man.

He wakes up early in the morning around 7 to 7:30 am.
I wake up late, anytime, who knows when anymore as
my sleep wake times are very irregular.



5-29-2020
Sarah Wilson Stillwell

Sunday, May 24, 2020

Air, water, sunshine, food. Top four essentials for life.

Air, water, sunshine, food. Top four essentials for life.


5-24-2020
Sarah-Wilson-Stillwell

The best investment is in yourself.

Several years ago my son asked me what I thought he should invest in
(to make money).

My answer: "Invest in yourself. That is the best thing you have."

It is the only thing you temporarily own for your entire life in your body.


5-24-2020
Sarah Wilson-Stillwell

Saturday, May 23, 2020

Friday, May 22, 2020

Last night he said I could have a heart attack.

Last night he said I could have a heart attack.

I get so excited.

I said
You are not going to have a heart attack.
You are eating better food more often now.


The androids are here. They are multiplying by the thousands, perhaps millions.

The androids are here. They are multiplying by the thousands, perhaps millions.

Bored billionaire people. Desire control. Think
they will live forever if they have plenty of money.
"Money will get you anything you want"
they cry as they age and know they are going to die.

They learned this in youth..

Desire to return to early childhood and adolescence
when beautiful moms and strong, powerful dads
were their idols.

The parents are gods, as children see parents,
adults and authority figures.

Innocence is what they seek to recover.

5-15-2020

Sarah Wilson Stillwell

Saturday, May 16, 2020

I have been instructed not to wear this summer blouse in public by a male counterpart.

I have been instructed not to wear this summer blouse in public
by a male counterpart.

Reasons given:

Makes me look bigger on top. Shows cleavage.
Shows my (nice female) shape from the front.
Shows the hump in my back from the backside.

Looks like something one female would wear
underneath other clothes.
Looks sexy.
Wouldn't want to attract other men or turn anyone on.
You are married.

"It's a summer top," I said. "It's not like lingerie. It's
not silky or flimsy. It's heavier material and covers well.
It will be cool in the summer."

Well, maybe in the summer if everyone else is wearing them....he said.

I just want to feel cool, at the right temperature when it is hot outside.




5-16-2020

Sarah Wilson Stillwell
58 year old woman with scoliosis.  haha 

Force vs allowing.

Force vs allowing.

5-12-2020
Sarah Wilson Stillwell

Myths I have experienced and witnessed in my life.

Myths I have experienced and witnessed in my life.

This has and can apply to anyone anwhere.

MYTHS

Obesity is in the genetic code/dna
The best buy is always is the largest package
You get what you pay for



People/he/she:

wants to see you happy
supports you in your educational choices
supports your career/job/position in life

supports your decisions
supports your choices

supports you in your endeavors
wants to see you succeed, to be successful even if
you become more successful and happy than they are

avoids saying things to make you unhappy, sad,
miserable, angry

is never rude, mean, insulting, sarcastic or abusive,
mentally or physically

avoids doings things to upset you
goes out of their way to please you

is proud of you for who you are
is proud of your accomplishments

understands your point of view
understands other's point of view

cares about your feelings
cares about what you want

gives selflessly
is unselfish and generous

puts others before themselves
is always polite

has no ulterior motives
expects nothing in return

is not possessive
is not controlling
is not demanding

does not push their ideas upon other people, things and animals
does not expect conformity

does not expect you to fit into their mold
does not expect anything to fit into the mold they created in their mind

does not throw fits, temper tantrums, go into blind rages
when they don't get their way

loves you for your mind
let your body go the hell with obesity, illness, and they will still love you
the same way they did the day they met you when you were healthy

can truly see many sides of things instead of just one side (their viewpoint)
will help without expecting something in return
does not keep track of what they have done for others

is truly sorry for being mean and won't do it again
has a strong conscience

has a strong sense of ethics
is flexible mentally, emotionally and physically
sees good in everything

is not judgmental
is not addicted to something
is honest, open and genuine

is not jealous or envious
does not want more than their "fair" share

is happy to see other life forms happy
is happy when you are happy, happy to see you happy and joyful
is excited when you are excited

does not hate someone or something
is not out to get anyone with revenge

is not anxious, nervous
is not hypercritical or critical
is not depressed

is not confused
is not warlike

does not blame someone else or something else

are able to look themselves in the mirror with honesty
admit when they are wrong, when they made a mistake
is truly sorry for any wrong hurtful destructive thing they said or did

thinks carefully before they speak
thinks carefully before they act out
appreciates true natural beauty wherever they may be

has confidence in others
truly supports the environment, mother earth
appreciates the totality of this short life

easily connects the dots
sees connections between themselves and all things

understands they are a piece of this most important puzzle
understands that nothing is insignificant

does not separate
does not discriminate

does not demean or minimize another for any reason
including their feelings, viewpoints, choices, reasons,
position or situation in life

does not think they are better than other people, animals, plants or things
is not egotistical

is natural
are not trying to be someone else
are not putting on airs just to appear good to others

is calm, patient, rational and reasonable
is faithful
believes before they see

listens to what you say without interrupting
listens to you without finishing your sentences for you

does not expect others to be just like them
is tolerant of differences in beings

does not feel like they have to mimic others to fit into a group
does not condemn others for being different

loves your uniqueness
loves the unique quality of anything

understands they are unique
understands everyone and every animal, plant and energy form is unique

does not project themselves onto others and the environment
does not force their opinions upon others

truly cares about your health; mentally, emotionally and physically
sincerely loves to see the healthy status of life forms

correctly interprets the meaning of an author's book
correctly interprets the moral of the movie or tv show they watch

correctly interprets the meaning of a song, a poem, a letter

is focused on doing the right thing to please themselves
is focused on doing the right things to please others

is not two-faced
does not speak with forked tongue

understands nature's laws
understands man is not above the laws of nature

understands moderation
understands patience

understands limits

does not push their agenda upon anyone
does not force anything upon any being

knows that desire is the first emotion before actualization/manifestation occurs







5-15-2020
still editing

Sarah Wilson Stillwell
























Tuesday, May 12, 2020

He wants to hold on to what he has. He doesn't want you to leave. He doesn't want you to go.

He wants to hold on to what he has. He doesn't want you to leave.
He doesn't want you to go.


Fishing methods.

Fishing methods.

Bait with alluring food. Bait Looks and smells good.

Shoot, blow away with a gun, a bullet, a bomb in the water;
not a good way to catch fish
as you blow it to smithereens. Hard to eat a smithereens bit of fish.

Net. Scoop up with a net. Get whole fish unharmed.




Why? Favorite and most asked question of babies.

Why? Favorite and most asked question of babies.

Least asked question of most adults due
to mass media propaganda and conditioning.

5-12-2020

Sarah Wilson Stillwell

Frugality is the opposite of stupidity.

Frugality is the opposite of stupidity.

I told my husband this the other day when we were at
Sam's Club in Raymore, MO.

He laughed and said he appreciated my frugality
as we walked through the store.

He spied lots
of premade processed junk I refused to get because
I know how to make meals and use spices.

He works hard at all of the odd jobs he does and
does not have room in his brain to figure out
what to eat and how to make it like I do.

We compliment one another in our differences.
Male/female. Day/night. Hard/soft.
Rigid/flexible.


5-12-2020

I believe every person wants to be happy like they were as a small child.

I believe every person wants to be happy like they were as a small child.

Some people maintain their childlike joy and curisosity throughout
adulthood. Some are miserable and don't know why.

Awareness and knowledge increases understanding.

Noticing how you feel after you eat certain foods, participate in
any activity, when you wake up and your mood when
you are around different kinds of people and places is
vitally important to maintaining happiness.

It is more than just having a thought to
change your attitude. If your body is sick due
to injury, illness, bad food or drink, overwork,
chronic stress, inadequate rest, no amount of
"positive thinking" will not work.

We are living beings in physical bodies that first
require energy from fresh air, clean water and good food sources
in the proper climate for us
so we can feel good and be happy.

Every mother knows this about her baby. Baby needs
warmth, fresh air, clean water and nourishing food.

Babies need to be held, tended and paid attention to
so they will learn and grow up to be healthy adults.

If a mother ignores the baby, never looks it in the eye
and never holds it, it cannot grow, learn and function properly.

Our body is constantly trying to maintain homeostasis,
completely without your conscious awareness.

You are not consciously thinking about your skin, bones,
teeth, hair, fingernails, vital organs or intestines and
telling them what to do. Yet all of these body parts
are doing their job all of the time and letting you
know if they are working properly by making you
feel how you feel and look how you look.

Healthy children, teens and adults require the
same basic essentials in order to experience health
and happiness.

Happiness is our natural nature. We are all born with it.

5-12-2020
Sarah Wilson Stillwell




Monday, May 11, 2020

Sunday, May 10, 2020

Saturday, May 9, 2020

He said Are you trying to make me have a heart attack?

He said
Are you trying to make me have a heart attack?

Dressed like that.

That would be the way to go.

You are so beautiful.

I'm a lucky man.

Let them eat cake.

Let them eat cake.

who said that and why?

5-9-2020

Why is TV known as the idiot box?

Why is TV known as the idiot box?

Read more at:
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/articleshow/1293470.cms?utm_source=contentofinterest&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=cppst



This term has been used to refer to a TV
set in a derogatory way since the late
1950s. The name stuck for two reasons.
TV has been a non-interactive device, and
the term 'idiot box' highlights the fact that it
is non-responsive.
According to some studies, a child addicted to TV
might suffer from slow metabolism, obesity,
myopie,
and might develop into a moron or an idiot.

This, the adjective idiot in the above term applies
both to the device in question and to its users.

Thank you for the offer but I don't want to eat glue today.

Thank you for the offer but I don't want to eat glue today.

I might try some again in the future
but for now I prefer being free
not bound up.

Food.
Bread, crackers, pasta noodles lasagna spaghetti
macaroni linguini  made from white or whole wheat flour,
cookies, cakes, doughnuts/donuts, pie crust, snacks made from this stuff,
gravy made from flour,  brownies, biscuits, rolls, dough,
cookie dough (ick!),  buns hamburger hot dog, kaiser rolls,
french bread, italian bread, any bread.

Arguing with a fool proves there are two.

Arguing with a fool proves there are two.

Climate. Temperature. Humidity. Air. Water. Food. Life.

Climate. Temperature. Humidity. Air. Water. Food. Life.

Friday, May 8, 2020

Grandma used to say You are what you eat.

Grandma used to say You are what you eat.

When I was a child I took that literally.
I thought if I ate a carrot I would turn into a carrot.
Now I know that is not what she meant.
I was a child. I didn't know any better.

Good food that is natural. It tastes good.
It keeps
you alive and functioning.

She called koolaid belly wash.



Try all you want but you can't make the world shut up

Try all you want but you can't make the world shut up

5-8-2020
Sarah Wilson Stillwell

Pig Latin is the way to communicate

Pig Latin is the way to communicate

5-8-2020
Sarah Wilson Stillwell

Mass media. The oldest entertainment industry in the world. Follow the news. Obsess with the news.

Mass media. The oldest entertainment industry in the world.
Follow the news. Obsess with the news.

5-8-2020

Sarah Wilson Stillwell

Follow the leaders or be a leader and follow yourself.

Follow the leaders or be a leader and follow yourself.


5-8-2020
Sarah Wilson Stillwell

Food. Is it good or bad for you?

Food. Is it good or bad for you?

Eat a certain food or drink and notice how you feel after eating it.

Feel good?  It's good for you.
Do you look good?

Is your skin fresh and healthy looking?
Is your hair full and shiny?

Are your fingernails and toenails healthy looking?

Do you make reasonable decisions that
are good for you and for others?

Do you feel happy?
Are you relaxed and focused?

Are you loving, kind, considerate, patient, understanding?

Are you confident?
Do you feel good about yourself?

Are you able to concentrate? Focus.



Feel bad?  It's most likely bad for you.

Do you look bad? Ill.
We all know what a sick person looks like.

Swollen, inflamed/ inflammation, acne,
boils, cysts, tumors,
skin rashes, sores,
puffy bags under the eyes,
swollen lymph node glands
anywhere in the body.

Do you act irrationally, losing your temper over trivial things?
Do you have angry outbursts?

Are you cranky? Complaining, accusatory, threatening, just
plain mean.

Do you have intense hatred for situations, people, anything?
Are you unable to understand simple things such as being polite?

Do you have a weight problem?

Are you in pain anywhere in your body?

Do you feel like you are losing your mind?

Do you feel nautious? Nauseated. Sick in the stomach.

Are you tired, fatigued, just plain worn out?

Are you having trouble sleeping: insomnia or
sleeping too much, unable to feel rested after
sleeping?

Do you have heartburn, acid indigestion, diarrhea,
constipation?

Is your gut making loud rumbling noises?

Some foods tend to build up toxins in the body over
a period of time so it is essential to pay attention to
the way you feel and what you have been eating
and drinking
recently if you start to feel bad.

Some of us are allergic to certain foods and chemicals.

The body does not lie.

5-8-2020
Sarah Wilson Stillwell

"Walk away from the 97% crowd. Don't use their excuses. Take charge of your own life." -- Jim Rohn

"Walk away from the 97% crowd. Don't use their excuses. Take charge of your own life."
-- Jim Rohn

Your Daily Quotation

Thursday, May 7, 2020

Does fast food mean quicker death?

Does fast food mean quicker death? 

When I am hungry I don't want to look at a picture of a hamburger. I want to eat one.

When I am hungry I don't want to look at a picture of a hamburger. I want to eat one.
Reality.

5-7-2020

Sarah Wilson Stillwell

I am living my life. My life could be a movie.

I am living my life. My life could be a movie. 

I like to watch movies and I'd rather live my life as if it were
a beautiful movie that makes me and others feel good.

5-7-2020

Sarah Wilson Stillwell

I love you means I understand.

I love you means I understand.

5-7-2020

Sarah Wilson Stillwell

Fixing other people is not my duty. It is my desire to follow myself.

Fixing other people is not my duty. It is my desire to follow myself.

Forcing, pushing, insisting, demanding
that another person should do as I say
and fit the mold that I have created in my mind
is not in my nature. 

In my experiences I have learned that by pushing
and shoving others, things or myself
I encounter resistance.  It results in negative,
painful results. Sometimes death my murder
or suicide.

Imbalance. Out of balance. Tense. Fake.
Upset. Rigid. Difficult. Hard.

Force equals resistance.

I have learned that when I am more aware of
and in tune with myself I feel better.
I allow the other to be what it is.
Appreciate and accept it is what it is
at that moment.
Showing and being by example is the
most effective way to learn.

Allowing equals acceptance.


Being aware of how I feel at
each moment and adjusting
myself so that I feel happy is
my instinct. It is the birth right
of every baby.
Every child.
Every teenager.
Every adult.

If my body is feeling pain I
ask myself why.

Is it something
I ate? Is an activity I did that
involved pushing my body
beyond its limits?

Am I tired; do
I need to sleep?

Feeling energetic?
Do I need to move my body in
glorious, wonderful,
exercise that makes ME feel good?

Listening to my natural born
intuition, my built in antenna radar
will always guide me to the
right path I will take.

When I follow my inner voice
I become naturally happy and
beautiful. Then I can share
this happiness everywhere I go
with any person, animal or plant
I encounter. This energy is
transferred from one being to
another. Even at great distances.

They see my beauty and joy
and want to experience it, too.
It makes them feel good.
This is the desire of all life.

Balance. Homeostasis. Relaxed. Natural.
Calm. Flexible. Easy.

I will then see the beauty and the
happiness in others and everywhere
I am.

We pick up and either absorb
or by osmosis (transfer),
I am not sure,
on the vibrations of
other live beings, sometimes we
pick up on these vibrations of
life forms that have left their old
body/bodies and transmuted into
another.

Dreams about those who have passed on
may come from absorption, transfer or
memories. I do not know for sure.
I know it is real for me.

5-7-2020

Sarah Wilson Stillwell












Wednesday, May 6, 2020

I remember suffering from fecal impaction/constipation alot when I was a child. The food I ate was mostly processed, easy to heat up like fast food.

I remember suffering from fecal impaction/constipation alot when I was a child.
The food I ate was mostly processed, easy to heat up like fast food.

When I ran I got terrible side "stitches", very painful in my side. It was so
bad I had to lay down for a long time. I remember one time my grandma told me to lay on
my stomach it would help relieve the pain faster that I couldn't get rid of
when laying on my back.

I remember going poop, number 2 when I was 6 years old and very hard
stool finally came out with bright red blood in it.

Mom had to give me Fletcher's Castoria to relieve the constipation.

She also gave us kids cod liver oil, a nasty tasting thing. That's what
mom's did back then. It was good for us.

I remember what us 4 kids ate: mostly "kid food", stuff that was processed,
premade, small bits, sweet and tasted good.

We ate lots of the cheapest white bread we could get.
I would tear off the crust and flatten my piece of bread
roll it into a ball
and eat it like that.

I hated onions so I wouldn' eat meatloaf.
Wouldn't eat steak.

We did not eat fresh salads. She didn't get carrots and celery
and cut them up for snacks like grandma did.
She never ate beets like grandma did.

We did have some fruit but not much: apples,
oranges, bananas, watermelon in the summer.

Mom fixed us more processed, easy to make food she didn't have to cook.

Pot pies, fish sticks, cereal, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches,
lipton's noodle soup in the box, canned soup,
boxed macaroni and cheese.

We ate lots of tv dinners
while sitting in front of the television.

We always had milk especially for the cereal.

She bought the velveeta blocks of cheese.  It was cheap.

We had tons of that
fake cheese. We loved mac'n'cheese.
We were kids and didn't know any better.

Cold hot dogs, the cheapest ones you could get, along with
the cheapest bologna available. Cheap lunchmeat like salami
or whatever was on sale.

Hamburger, the greasiest and cheapest.
The cheapest bacon you could get.

Pickles, dill and sweet.

Mom was cheap, tight with the money so she wouldn't buy
barbecue sauce. She told me if you mix ketchup and mustard
that made bbq sauce. I was a child. I believed her.

Canned spaghetti o's and canned macaroni and "beef" aka "beefaroni".
Potato chips, cheese curls and pops, pretzels, corn chips.

Mom made tuna salad from a premade kit and used the cheapest
salad dressing you could get -spin blend- to put it together.

She just didn't like or didn't know how
to make things from scratch.

She never made pie crust, homemade
pies, cakes or cookies. She never made a pot roast with potatoes,
carrots and onions.

She never made ham and beans in a crock pot,
slow cooking all day after soaking them first like grandma did.

She never baked a turkey
and did not know how to make home made stuffing.

I had my mom over for a visit on Thanksgiving Day
about 2 years before she died.

I had cooked all of the traditional food.
She was very quiet, as she usually was.

Then she said, "That was very good stuffing. It tasted great."
I said, "Mom, it was stove top stuffing mix. I just added some
celery, onions, turkey broth and spices. I really didn't make it
from scratch. It's so easy to make."

Candy apples. Caramel apples. Doughnuts. Donuts. Mom bought cake mixes
and would make a cake now and then. We had lots of ice cream
and store bought cookies. I remember getting into the refrigerator
and eating the leftover bits of "cinnamon" flavored sugary stuff
used to make the candy apples.  So sweet and tasty.

My teeth were rotten by the time I made it to grandma's
at age 6.

Grandma took me to the dentist to fix my rotten teeth due
to the sugar consumption and my not knowing how to
wash off the ick off my teeth.

I was infected with pinworms so bad. Grandma was angry
about the whole situation.

We ate lots of candy. Lots of candy bars. Drank kool-aid
and soda pop instead
of lots of water or fruit juice.

Later on I began sneaking soda pop when I lived with grandma.
She had a limit: one can a day.
Grandma said sugar is bad for your teeth,
kool-aid is belly wash with no nutrients.
I didn't listen to her, defiant as a child will be.
I hoarded Jolly Rancher's candy in my clothes dresser drawers.
I hoarded all kinds of candy during my life.

I stashed chocolate bars in there, too in case I needed
a sweet sugar fix because if I left them out laying around
someone else might eat them.

Mom drank instant Lipton Tea and Pepsi cola daily. She added quite a
bit of sugar to the tea. I guess she didn't want to go to effort to
heat up water and make tea using a bag or tea leaves.
Whatever was easiest, she did it.
Premade store bought stuff is the way to go, Joe.

Mom never made cole slaw. My little brother, Darryl showed me
how to make it when I was 21. He probably learned how to make
it from our dad.

Mom never made potato salad.

I don't know for sure but I wonder if mom thought because
she was so strikingly beautiful when she was young
that she didn't have to do
anything like cooking from scratch.

Grandma did not show me how to cook. She just took
me to to grocery store and made food every day at home.

She made a lot of home cooked meals and we had lots
of canned goods available like soup, which I love
and as I have progressed I learned on my own how
to make soup.

I couldn't cook anything but a grilled cheese sandwich
and heat up a can of soup when I was 15.
A crying shame.

I have learned how to cook many things since then
because I had the desire to do so
and now it's probably too late
















I said I was, I used to be ... pretty, beautiful, look good

I said I was, I used to be ...
pretty, beautiful, look good

He said I am
You still are
but I didn't feel that way

You're well put together
Shawn said, a guy standing in line at church pantry
53rd and Raytown Road
Kansas City, Missouri

He gave me his number
insisted I call him anytime
I never did

He caught my attention .. he was talking so much
philosophy and teaching people in the line
standing there waiting for food
so I talked to him for awhile
and he gave me the lowdown
on stuff

tbc





New math: 1 plus 9 plus 8 plus 4 equals 2000 plus 20 more years of lies

New math: 1 plus 9 plus 8 plus 4 equals 2000
plus 20 more years
of lies 

Tuesday, May 5, 2020

You can say what you say

You can say what you say
all you want to say
about me

You ain't me
I ain't you
Never will be me

never will be me

so do what you do
what you do
and i'll do what i do

do what i do

because you ain't me
and i ain't you
never will be me

nover will be me

4-10-2019

Sarah Wilson Stillwell

Sunday, May 3, 2020

The walker. The talker.

The walker. The talker.

Yesterday my neighbor Peter
told me I am the walker.

Husband has told me for many years
Too bad you can't make money
talking because
that's all you do.

5-3-2020


Saturday, May 2, 2020

The cracker incident.

On April 17, 2020 the only things I ate were a half a package of "generic"
Ritz crackers from Aldi's, about 3 ounces of hot pepper white cheese
and a can of Campbell's chicken noodle soup.

The next day I was miserable.  Contrary to my usual going
to the bathroom with ease, I was bound up, locked up and feeling
like "crap". Constipated by the glue in the gluten I ate along
with the  gooey cheese.

So on April 18, 2020 I decided to stop eating crackers, bread, noodles, buns,
cookies, cake, pie, donuts (yuck!! I haven't eaten those
disgusting things in years)--- anything made with flour
for one month to see what would happen.

As of today, May 2, 2020 I have lost ten pounds without even
trying. My intent was to feel better in my gut, not to lose
weight.

Foods That Cause Constipation


Anger and intolerance are the twin enemies of correct understanding. -- Mahatma Gandhi

Anger and intolerance are the twin enemies of correct understanding.
-- Mahatma Gandhi

Friday, May 1, 2020

He doesn't care about how much money you make.

He doesn't care about how much money you make.

He expects you to look good, the way you looked when you met him.

He wants you to be real and natural.

A man is designed for hard, strenuous work. He doesn't
expect a woman to do the kind of work he does.

If you have piled on makeup to look good and done other phony stuff
he will be shocked and scared half to death when he sees you without
all that makeup, glitter, glam, flashy, fake stuff.

If you allow yourself to add 30 pounds or more, gaining a lot of
weight because you are "comfortable" in the relationship and
believe it's okay to let yourself go because he will still "love you"
for your "personality"
regardless how you look, think again. This is a huge turnoff for a man.
He doesn't want to feel like he's having sex with a waterbed.

The minute he hears you are a feminist he is turned off.

He loves your/my long hair.

If you wear makeup keep it to a minimum. He expects you to
look like you did when you met him. If you look totally different
without makeup it scares him off.

Big muscles belong to men. If you look like a sumo wrestler
it's a turn off.

Alex is a man. He is a natural born mesomorph.
He likes to get up early in the morning.
I am naturally an ectomorph.
I like to sleep late and am slow to awaken.

He and his roommate, Travis LeVee talked with me at
length and we compared our arms while standing
outside in the driveway.

Alex has very wide shoulders and is musclebound with huge arms.
Travis is leaner and also has lots of muscle in his arms, abdomen
and legs.

I, on the other hand, have skinny little arms,
a lean abdomen and more fat distrubution in the
rearend and thighs. I am a girl/female/woman with this
natural born shape.

We all appreciated who and what we are.

Thanks guys!!


Thank you, Alex Tate and Travis LeVee
 Conversations in February, March and April, 2020.




No man has wanted to share me with any other.

No man has wanted to share me with any other.

They desired to possess me.

Why?

5-1-2020

Sarah Wilson Stillwell

I learned the most important things at home, with family, through experiences not in school.

I learned the most important things at home, with family, through experiences not in school.

4-29-2020

Sarah Wilson Stillwell

I'm betting it's mold in here

 I must have mold on the brain and my whole body is loaded with mold fungi bugs and toxic waste from all of it