Grandma said I would never be alone, never have to worry about having things

 some of it is true. i have plenty of things and a house to live in

however i have been alone as far as having friends for years

i am not alone only because i am married to him

and he often shoves me away tells me to leave, go away when i choose to discuss something he disagrees with, doesn't understand or does not want to do

cleaning up this house has taken far too long. years and years of accumulation

i am fed up with clutter and junk

i want a nice clean functional beautiful home to live in